tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1913455500999990472024-03-05T20:45:53.111-08:00FinnginnNotes on philosophy, poetry, bartending, politics, copywriting, parenthood, whatever's occurring to me...Finnginnhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11408363976804920106noreply@blogger.comBlogger187125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-191345550099999047.post-37894762746803079082023-12-23T15:13:00.001-08:002023-12-23T15:13:08.338-08:00Finnginn's Favourite Festive Drinks: Number 1 - The Gimlet<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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</div><div><br></div><div>Anticipation is better than reward. </div><div><br></div><div>Cocktail hour in the Finnginn household is an established part of the weekend routine, and there’s no beating the thought of the sharp citrus hit of an ice cold lime green Gimlet. </div><div><br></div><div>It's an easy cocktail to make as you can substitute a lime cordial for sugar syrup and fresh lime. </div><div><br></div><div>(One of detective Philip Marlowe’s clients in Raymond Chandler’s The Long Goodbye opines about the quality of the Gimlets in the cocktail bar they meet in, saying: “A real Gimlet should be half gin and half Rose’s lime juice and nothing else. It beats Martinis hollow.” )</div><div><br></div><div>The essential part of the process is to shake the mixture over ice. The key to making half-diluted gin palatable is temperature.</div><div><br></div><div>In my bartending days, I would "freeze" the glass by putting ice and soda water in it while I mixed a Martini in the Boston Tin. Good odds a drunk person would take a sip of water and look perplexed if I placed this on the front bar.</div><div><br></div><div><b>The Perfect Gimlet</b></div><div><br></div><div>Cold glass. Cold mix of gin and cordial (squeeze of lime to freshen it up). Angostura Bitters. Just don't try and hit the high FaLaLaLaLas at the Carol Service afterwards!</div><div><br></div><div><b>Teetotal Alternative</b></div><div><b><br></b></div><div>Lemon barley water - that'll be my 5pm drink for dry January. Got to get that sour hit somewhere!</div><div><br></div><div><b>Happy Xmas Everyone!</b></div><div><b><br></b></div><div>Thanks for reading and sharing your favourite drinks on the social media. It's been loads of fun. As usual I've overstretched myself with no planning, but it's been a great diversion from the grind of corporate copywriting.</div><div><br></div><div>Catch you in the New Year!</div><div><br></div><div><br></div>Finnginnhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11408363976804920106noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-191345550099999047.post-70435070907778466102023-12-21T04:04:00.000-08:002023-12-21T05:43:51.687-08:00Finnginn's Favourite Festive Drinks: Number 2 - Port<p><span style="font-family: courier;"><br /></span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;">My notes for today’s blog read as follows:</span></p><p></p><ul style="text-align: left;"><li><span style="font-family: courier;">Tawny vs ruby vs LBV</span></li><li><span style="font-family: courier;">Cheeky vimto?</span></li><li><span style="font-family: courier;">With what cheese?</span></li></ul><p></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;">Just thought I’d give you a peek behind the curtain of how these articles are constructed. Typically I’ll start with these notes and then write an introduction. Then expand out the notes into paragraphs, then go back in to the text editor and revise at the sentence level. </span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;"><br /></span></p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEheoSfBbMtYeFBxlIJJxqDeDYnhykNI8uXYSe9C4MZaat2qmoXcv7v13Vr6vTP7HpAfyWgtsuRoS3K4EjqV6na_WaQFLVGfwAABfXviTduhDBJVHBplTijnC6f4YRfHYBW8KDdMJp163chsNSYh-RzSpsf3R3Pxvveg4DaqMWd9Av37ptfsInOeEjdRiJc/s1400/glass%20of%20port.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="949" data-original-width="1400" height="271" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEheoSfBbMtYeFBxlIJJxqDeDYnhykNI8uXYSe9C4MZaat2qmoXcv7v13Vr6vTP7HpAfyWgtsuRoS3K4EjqV6na_WaQFLVGfwAABfXviTduhDBJVHBplTijnC6f4YRfHYBW8KDdMJp163chsNSYh-RzSpsf3R3Pxvveg4DaqMWd9Av37ptfsInOeEjdRiJc/w400-h271/glass%20of%20port.jpg" width="400" /></a></div><br /><span style="font-family: courier;"><br /></span><p></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;">This week I thought I’d just pop these notes into Google’s Bard “AI” content plagiariser and get it to write the thing for me.</span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;">I used the following prompt:</span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;"><i>“Write a Finnginn style blog article with the title "Finnginn's Favourite Festive Drinks: Number 2 - Port" based on these notes: Tawny vs ruby vs LBV; Cheeky vimto?; With the Cheese?”</i></span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;">Bard seems to think that Finnginn is some kind of pirate and after some fairly laboured and dull descriptions of the three affordable port types finished with this paragraph.</span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;"><i>“Cheeky Vimto? With the cheese?</i></span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;"><i>Now, before you go pourin' Vimto in yer port (though I wouldn't put it past some o' ye!), remember, port is meant to be savoured. Take your time, swirl it in yer glass, and let the flavours dance on yer tongue. And as for the cheese? Well, that's a whole other story for another day. Just know that a good Stilton or a creamy Camembert can be the perfect partner for your port (though maybe not the Vimto).”</i></span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;">Large Language Models such as Bard are trained on billions of examples of text data, and produce outputs as correlated best guesses of likely word combinations that form grammatical sentences. </span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;">A “Cheeky Vimto” you’ll remember is the classic combination of 275ml blue WKD alcopop and 50ml ruby port beloved of UK clubbers circa 2005. In a separate prompt, I asked Bard for a recipe for a Cheeky Vimto and it gave a passable one.</span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;">All this is weird because the actual blog I wrote up from my notes is as follows:</span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;"><b>Finnginn's Favourite Festive Drinks: Number 2 - Port</b></span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;">I've written a handy poem to help you remember your different types of port. (I've excluded vintage port for reasons budgetary and literary). Here it is:</span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;"><b>Finginn's guide to the affordable ports</b></span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;">Tawny’s brawny,</span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;">Ruby’s cheap, </span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;">But FTW: LBV!</span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;">(“Cheeky Vimto?” - “Not for me.”)</span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;">-</span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;">As for the cheese I’ll be pairing with my <a href="https://www.waitrose.com/ecom/products/grahams-late-bottled-vintage-port/064410-32688-32689" target="_blank">Graham’s Late Bottled Vintage</a>? Here’s my top 5 Xmas Tunes for 2023!</span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;"><br /></span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;">5: Christmas Wrapping: The Waitresses</span></p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><iframe allowfullscreen="" class="BLOG_video_class" height="266" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/ARq6uYSsUq0" width="320" youtube-src-id="ARq6uYSsUq0"></iframe></div><br /><span style="font-family: courier;"><br /></span><p></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;">4: Staple Singers: Who Took the Merry out of Christmas?</span></p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><iframe allowfullscreen="" class="BLOG_video_class" height="266" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/s4rB5SdX0-o" width="320" youtube-src-id="s4rB5SdX0-o"></iframe></div><br /><span style="font-family: courier;"><br /></span><p></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;">3: Boney M: Mary’s Boy Child</span></p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><iframe allowfullscreen="" class="BLOG_video_class" height="266" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/cmm1gt_2SkQ" width="320" youtube-src-id="cmm1gt_2SkQ"></iframe></div><br /><span style="font-family: courier;"><br /></span><p></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;">2: The Three Tenors: Adeste Fideles!</span></p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><iframe allowfullscreen="" class="BLOG_video_class" height="266" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/BVTSMQ3JI_M" width="320" youtube-src-id="BVTSMQ3JI_M"></iframe></div><br /><span style="font-family: courier;"><br /></span><p></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;">1: Dolly Parton: Hard Candy Christmas</span></p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><iframe allowfullscreen="" class="BLOG_video_class" height="266" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/GOzi-gD7-ts" width="320" youtube-src-id="GOzi-gD7-ts"></iframe></div><br /><span style="font-family: courier;"><br /></span><p></p><div><span style="font-family: courier;">What cheesy Xmas tracks will you be rockin' around the Xmas tree to after a sweet and mellow glass of port? Let us know in the comments or on the social media.</span></div><div><span style="font-family: courier;"><br /></span></div><div>Photo by <a href="https://unsplash.com/@stefangrage?utm_content=creditCopyText&utm_medium=referral&utm_source=unsplash">Stefan Grage</a> on <a href="https://unsplash.com/photos/two-liquor-bottle-beside-wine-glass-on-brown-table-pt6YX-LkQ64?utm_content=creditCopyText&utm_medium=referral&utm_source=unsplash">Unsplash</a><span style="font-family: courier;"></span></div>Finnginnhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11408363976804920106noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-191345550099999047.post-3444509339336827082023-12-19T06:55:00.000-08:002023-12-19T06:55:58.189-08:00Finnginn’s Favourite Festive Drinks: Number 3 - Liqueur Coffee<p><span style="font-family: courier;"><br /></span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;">Poultry including turkey is a great source of the amino acid L-tryptophan - a chain molecule so acute in its effects that a <a href="https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/6764927/#:~:text=The%20weight%20of%20evidence%20indicates,latency%20(time%20to%20sleep)." target="_blank">single gram can cause a delay in sleep latency</a>. So if you find yourself nodding off during the Dr Who Xmas Special - you can blame the tryptophan not the triple amaretto you over-generously poured yourself.</span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;">For those of us anxious to stay awake to be disappointed by the Dr Who Xmas Special we’re going to need a post prandial stimulant. Coffee should suffice here, I don’t want a repeat of the Xmas where I made space at the table for three last minute Russian guests only to overhear one of them say <i>“Нет, Виталий, мы не принимаем амфетамины до окончания банкета.”</i></span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;">I’ll never quite get the appeal of the Espresso Martini. Who wants to drink cold coffee? I recommend that we normal hot coffee drinkers have a delicious Liqueur Coffee to perk us up at some point after the pudding and before the cheese board.</span></p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiPnjwG_s-1fPlkuZHWdzRiPwSrm8L9-TAVN0sU_8QUlQBM1BWP-yud5gpHmUZ0aDqo9UIDjcR-C0KVwlcjdxW6-04QA-rmmjkWfz1GZDLqeQv6n6lfpndVDQ31-NH6qORIAol0vVMoLo0GSy8IpFzwE1ZXoHILkhFApLpY3jzBu3LFf-ByJ3K4OwNyArU/s1280/coffee-3120758_1280.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="853" data-original-width="1280" height="266" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiPnjwG_s-1fPlkuZHWdzRiPwSrm8L9-TAVN0sU_8QUlQBM1BWP-yud5gpHmUZ0aDqo9UIDjcR-C0KVwlcjdxW6-04QA-rmmjkWfz1GZDLqeQv6n6lfpndVDQ31-NH6qORIAol0vVMoLo0GSy8IpFzwE1ZXoHILkhFApLpY3jzBu3LFf-ByJ3K4OwNyArU/w400-h266/coffee-3120758_1280.jpg" width="400" /></a></div><br /><span style="font-family: courier;"><br /></span><p></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;"><b>What is it?</b></span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;">Liqueur coffee is sweetened coffee with a measure of alcoholic spirit added and cream floated on the top.</span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;">When I was younger I didn’t need coffee. If I was tired, I simply took a nap. Parenthood and the 9-to-5 grind removed this privilege, so I (like so many others) became slave to the bean - if only to stop the embarrassment of nodding off at the office desk while my hydrated caffeinated Gen Z colleagues giggle at the elder-millennial drooling in his keyboard.</span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;">These days I have a mug most days to fight the existential fatigue but, if I have one after 3pm, I’ll fall asleep fine at night and then awake suddenly in the wee hours and be unable to get back to sleep for an hour.</span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;">People who know more about coffee might disagree but personally I think freeze dried instant is fine for our purpose here - you’re going to add sugar and put a glug of grog in it anyway so save your finest Arabica whole beans for Boxing Day morning and go for Gold Blend instead.</span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;"><b>Pro tip:</b> Adding sugar makes it easier to float the cream. Pour single cream over the back of a spoon and it will form a distinct layer on the top of the coffee.</span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;">Any old cupboard booze can liven up a coffee. I’ll be going for Armagnac - as I’ll have some on hand to light the pudding. Liqueur Coffees are named after the country where (approximately) the bottle you choose originates. So mine is a French Coffee, someone taking rum will be drinking a Jamaican Coffee, Irish Coffee made with Jameson’s or Bushmills depending on whether you're Catholic or Protestant, Vitaly definitely doesn’t need a Russian Coffee but if he did it would be made with Vodka.</span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;"><b>Teetotal Alternative:</b> I don’t want to seem unimaginative here but I’m just going to go with coffee.</span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;">What are you splashing into your Xmas day coffee? Let me know in the comments below or on the social media. </span></p><div><br /></div>Image by <a href="https://pixabay.com/users/grafmex-7212763/?utm_source=link-attribution&utm_medium=referral&utm_campaign=image&utm_content=3120758">Max</a> from <a href="https://pixabay.com//?utm_source=link-attribution&utm_medium=referral&utm_campaign=image&utm_content=3120758">Pixabay</a>Finnginnhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11408363976804920106noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-191345550099999047.post-55836710134939479772023-12-14T02:54:00.000-08:002023-12-14T06:16:32.458-08:00Finnginn's Favourite Festive Drinks: Number 4 - Dishwasher Vodka<p><span style="font-family: courier;">If you are stuck for a last minute gift idea for a sweet-toothed friend, remember: you can convert their favourite candy into an alcoholic beverage using your dishwasher.</span></p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhapI5QwlrS6iLnXXS4rX2Sb_wkkIy9xv3Rp4wivkm1xEqclOP4c1bWQN-9Se352HF-PSqujalH1kumpD_WT8XWKkMuEVoHqmm03xFLRHBt-j_9mumsC0YkeK3n_URzWIb_GQeiZCq1NWP9jQ8Mve80TWgj3cd-su2xfB1KXZTeQSK8BTeM2T3lIUp5CPc/s3621/PXL_20231214_101217264.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="2761" data-original-width="3621" height="305" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhapI5QwlrS6iLnXXS4rX2Sb_wkkIy9xv3Rp4wivkm1xEqclOP4c1bWQN-9Se352HF-PSqujalH1kumpD_WT8XWKkMuEVoHqmm03xFLRHBt-j_9mumsC0YkeK3n_URzWIb_GQeiZCq1NWP9jQ8Mve80TWgj3cd-su2xfB1KXZTeQSK8BTeM2T3lIUp5CPc/w400-h305/PXL_20231214_101217264.jpg" width="400" /></a></div><br /><span style="font-family: courier;"><br /></span><p></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;"><b>What is it?</b></span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;">Definitely not bathtub gin.</span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;">Combining sweets and vodka is all about applying enough heat to melt the sweets without boiling off the alcohol. You can’t just chuck all the ingredients in a saucepan and hope for the best. Ideally, it will be done in the bottle in a temperature controlled water bath. Now where can I lay my hands on one of those…?</span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;">The dishwasher is not the first kitchen appliance you turn to for cooking. But it is basically a giant steamer with fairly accurate temperature controls. </span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;">(I once read that you could wrap a side of salmon in tin foil and poach it in the dishwasher, but unfortunately I never owned a dishwasher before I was married and my wife is allergic to salmon so still no dice. Do let me know how you get on if you try it! - I reckon a quick shine at 60℃ should do the trick.)</span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;">Lidl's delicious <a href="https://www.lidl.co.uk/p/putinoff-five-time-distilled-vodka/p85472" target="_blank">Putinoff brand vodka</a> makes a good base. Don't confuse it with <a href="https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Putinka#:~:text=Putinka%20(Russian%3A%20%D0%9F%D1%83%D1%82%D0%B8%D0%BD%D0%BA%D0%B0)%20is,owned%20Moscow%20Distillery%20Crystal%20company." target="_blank">Putinka</a> vodka or profits from your purchase will go to allies of the Russian premier. Any old cheap vodka can be used as a base.</span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;"><b>Dishwasher Vodka Method</b></span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;">Remove a few ml of vodka from the bottle, replace the missing liquid with sweeties, screw the cap on tightly, pop it in the dishwasher on its intensive 70℃ cycle (ethanol you will recall from high school chemistry boils at around 78℃). When it has finished its run, let the glass bottle cool down slowly (transferring to fridge straight away may lead to a shattered bottle) , shake gently to combine and then either gift wrap or chill ready for serving.</span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;"><b>Pro tip:</b> As the dishwasher’s running anyway, you might as well get all the unusual glasses - the sherry schooners, brandy snifters, martini glasses and champagne coups - out of the cupboard and treat them to a detergent-free hotwash ready for the season they’ll be in most demand.</span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;"><b>Teetotal Alternative</b></span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;">Hot chocolate bombs. You’ll need some basic chocolaterie skills here and a silicone mould will help. But the principle is basically the same as making easter eggs. Hide marshmallows and a spoonful of instant cocoa in a chocolate sphere and then melt the whole thing in a small pan of milk.</span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;">What sweets would you like to see combined with vodka? Let me know in the comments or on the social media.</span></p><p><span style="font-family: inherit;">Photo credit: author's own</span></p><p><br /></p>Finnginnhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11408363976804920106noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-191345550099999047.post-16572975988521822682023-12-13T05:40:00.000-08:002023-12-13T05:41:34.882-08:00Finnginn’s Favourite Festive Drinks: Number 5 - Wine<p><span style="font-family: courier;"> <span style="font-size: 11pt; white-space-collapse: preserve;">I know we’re not supposed to admit it, but getting drunk occasionally is quite good fun. And the best kind of drunk in this drinker’s opinion is wine drunk. That’s why wine forms the backbone to my Christmas day drinking. </span></span></p><span id="docs-internal-guid-25370e5f-7fff-aba0-743e-a7c7f68ca6ad"><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-size: 11pt; font-variant-alternates: normal; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; font-variant-position: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;"><span style="font-family: courier;">There’s the indulgent <a href="https://www.finnginn.co.uk/2023/12/finnginns-favourite-festive-drinks.html" target="_blank">morning glass of fizz</a> that we have already examined and we may yet come to the best sweet and heady fortified number with which to wash down the final crumb of stilton. But for today let’s look at the still and unfortified wines that I’ll be sampling whilst marking an X in the base of the sprouts and glazing the Xmas ham.</span></span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-size: 11pt; font-variant-alternates: normal; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; font-variant-position: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;"><span style="font-family: courier;"><br /></span></span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-size: 11pt; font-variant-alternates: normal; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; font-variant-position: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;"></span></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgvlG1o8vmOOTEoMx-FOnetqt5P3GFkM6uG6EjL2QJNcZe7lUUwepVhUa9MnzzPhX5mDylvcyXbrWoYysQHlYv-B3p4Ipz9VdgjOC8cKy3xrG_aJ0hbw4-HWpbmZaewJTUv3zm3xjkN4UguUBNuUECyZZCrAKv1Gj4iNIwXUlRcJz8MhMRaYN4iW4gx1T4/s6036/chuttersnap-x5O1GmmGoPE-unsplash.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="4024" data-original-width="6036" height="266" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgvlG1o8vmOOTEoMx-FOnetqt5P3GFkM6uG6EjL2QJNcZe7lUUwepVhUa9MnzzPhX5mDylvcyXbrWoYysQHlYv-B3p4Ipz9VdgjOC8cKy3xrG_aJ0hbw4-HWpbmZaewJTUv3zm3xjkN4UguUBNuUECyZZCrAKv1Gj4iNIwXUlRcJz8MhMRaYN4iW4gx1T4/w400-h266/chuttersnap-x5O1GmmGoPE-unsplash.jpg" width="400" /></a></div><br /><span style="font-family: courier;"><br /></span></span><p></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-size: 11pt; font-variant-alternates: normal; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; font-variant-position: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;"><span style="font-family: courier;"><br /></span></span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-size: 11pt; font-variant-alternates: normal; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; font-variant-position: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;"><span style="font-family: courier;"><b>What is it?</b></span></span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-size: 11pt; font-variant-alternates: normal; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; font-variant-position: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;"><span style="font-family: courier;"><br /></span></span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-size: 11pt; font-variant-alternates: normal; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; font-variant-position: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;"><span style="font-family: courier;">Wine is fermented grape juice.</span></span></p><span style="font-family: courier;"><br /></span><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-size: 11pt; font-variant-alternates: normal; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; font-variant-position: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;"><span style="font-family: courier;">I’m going to keep this brief, as it’s hard to write about wine without sounding like a pompous prick: I don’t want to know that “The vintners of the Côtes de Gascogne region are working miracles with lesser known varieties such as <i>gros manseng</i>…” I want to know if I can <a href="https://groceries.aldi.co.uk/en-GB/p-pierre-jaurant-cotes-de-gascogne-75cl/4061464042698" target="_blank">get it in Aldi for less than a fiver</a>.</span></span></p><span style="font-family: courier;"><br /></span><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-size: 11pt; font-variant-alternates: normal; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; font-variant-position: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;"><span style="font-family: courier;"><b>White</b></span></span></p><span style="font-family: courier;"><br /></span><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-size: 11pt; font-variant-alternates: normal; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; font-variant-position: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;"><span style="font-family: courier;">I like my white wine to taste of citrus and slate - like licking lemon juice from a defelted snooker table. So naturally, my first choice for wine is always a bone dry <a href="https://www.winesdirect.com/wine/by-grape/sauvignon-blanc/" target="_blank">Sauvignon Blanc</a>. </span></span></p><span style="font-family: courier;"><br /></span><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-size: 11pt; font-variant-alternates: normal; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; font-variant-position: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;"><span style="font-family: courier;"><b>Rosé</b></span></span></p><span style="font-family: courier;"><br /></span><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-size: 11pt; font-variant-alternates: normal; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; font-variant-position: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;"><span style="font-family: courier;">Rosé is not just for summer! We’ll definitely have a chilled box of <a href="https://www.sainsburys.co.uk/gol-ui/product/la-vieille-ferme-rose-wine-15l?istCompanyId=1e096408-041f-4238-994e-a7cf46bf9413&istFeedId=689af7a8-5842-4d88-be59-1ee5688a81b5&istItemId=lprptlqpm&istBid=t&&cmpid=cpc&utm_source=Google&utm_medium=cpc&utm_campaign=20333921261&utm_content=shopping&utm_term=%257Bsku%257D&utm_custom1=&utm_custom2=759-449-0952&gad_source=1&gclid=Cj0KCQiAyeWrBhDDARIsAGP1mWSGZ852qOlk8G359hW8wQu7nCeHaQrtg5MIQjhnsOH8P1jBynGs6AAaAoIcEALw_wcB&gclsrc=aw.ds" target="_blank">La Vielle Ferme</a> in the refrigerator over Xmas for any rosé fans that pop by. </span></span></p><span style="font-family: courier;"><br /></span><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-size: 11pt; font-variant-alternates: normal; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; font-variant-position: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;"><span style="font-family: courier;"><b>Red</b></span></span></p><span style="font-family: courier;"><br /></span><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-size: 11pt; font-variant-alternates: normal; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; font-variant-position: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;"><span style="font-family: courier;">As far as crowdpleasers go, you can’t go far wrong with a South American Malbec. Personally, I’ll be tucking into a <a href="https://www.vivino.com/GB/en/dragon-hills-pinot-noir/w/2700570" target="_blank">Romanian Pinot Noir</a> with my Xmas dinner. Yum!</span></span></p><span style="font-family: courier;"><br /></span><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-size: 11pt; font-variant-alternates: normal; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; font-variant-position: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;"><span style="font-family: courier;">If it’s not too late to add it to your Christmas list, there’s a great dialogue by Plato called <a href="https://www.gutenberg.org/files/1600/1600-h/1600-h.htm" target="_blank">The Symposium</a> - the version I have is translated by Percy Bysshe Shelley. I love how it opens with a discussion of how drunk the assembled Athenians of note should get (they are all hungover from the public celebrations the previous night):</span></span></p><span style="font-family: courier;"><br /></span><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-size: 11pt; font-variant-alternates: normal; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; font-variant-position: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;"><span style="font-family: courier;"><i>“Whereupon it was unanimously agreed that this would not be a drunken party and that the wine was to be served merely by way of refreshment.”</i></span></span></p><span style="font-family: courier;"><br /></span><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-size: 11pt; font-variant-alternates: normal; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; font-variant-position: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;"><span style="font-family: courier;">I think that sums up the spirit of my approach to drinking wine on Xmas day! Everything in moderation! And d</span></span><span style="font-family: courier;"><span style="font-size: 14.6667px; white-space-collapse: preserve;">on’t be the Alcibiades at the party! (The Athenian statesman and general turns up to the symposium late, pissed, and insistent on singing love songs).</span></span></p><div><br /></div><span style="font-family: courier;"><br /></span><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-size: 11pt; font-variant-alternates: normal; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; font-variant-position: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;"><span style="font-family: courier;"><b>Teetotal Alternative</b></span></span></p><span style="font-family: courier;"><br /></span><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-size: 11pt; font-variant-alternates: normal; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; font-variant-position: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;"><span style="font-family: courier;">Being very much a supportive husband, I willingly sipped a bunch of non-alcoholic wines when my wife was pregnant and, with the exception of some of the “No”secco style fizzes, they were all awful. Just go with grape juice or <a href="https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Appletiser" target="_blank">Appletiser</a>.</span></span></p><span style="font-family: courier;"><br /></span><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-size: 11pt; font-variant-alternates: normal; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; font-variant-position: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;"><span style="font-family: courier;">Have you got any wine recommendations? Share them in the comments or on social media.</span></span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-size: 11pt; font-variant-alternates: normal; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; font-variant-position: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;"><span style="font-family: courier;"><br /></span></span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-size: 11pt; font-variant-alternates: normal; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; font-variant-position: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">Photo by <a href="https://unsplash.com/@chuttersnap?utm_content=creditCopyText&utm_medium=referral&utm_source=unsplash">CHUTTERSNAP</a> on <a href="https://unsplash.com/photos/white-labeled-bottles-x5O1GmmGoPE?utm_content=creditCopyText&utm_medium=referral&utm_source=unsplash">Unsplash</a>
</span></p><span style="font-family: courier;"><br /></span><br />Finnginnhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11408363976804920106noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-191345550099999047.post-85650167448603317082023-12-11T06:57:00.000-08:002023-12-11T07:01:17.184-08:00Finnginn's Favourite Festive Drinks Number 6 - Smoking Bishop<p><span style="font-family: courier;">Towards the end of A Christmas Carol, Charles Dickens gives the central character Scrooge - newly converted to the merriment of Christmas following a busy night the details of which you’ll probably recall from the book/play/film/puppet show/muppet show/episode of Blackadder etc and don’t concern us here - this short speech. The reformed miser says to his clerk (to whom he had formerly refused a day off for Xmas day):</span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;"><i>“A merrier Christmas, Bob, my good fellow, than I have given you for many a year. I’ll raise your salary, and endeavour to assist your struggling family, and we will discuss your affairs this very afternoon, over a Christmas bowl of smoking bishop, Bob. Make up the fires, and buy another coal-scuttle before you dot another i, Bob Cratchit.”</i></span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;">The “...Christmas bowl of smoking bishop...” intrigued me, so I looked it up and there’s a whole family of mulled wine recipes that were so popular in Victorian times that a reference like Scrooge’s above could be dropped without further explanation.</span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;">Here at the home of the Finnginn blog, we are always saddened to discover that a once-loved Xmas tradition has bitten the proverbial dust. Fortunately, we have a voice, and a host of readers and together we might just reinvigorate the corpse of the smoking bishop tradition.</span></p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiuUtTk20cS6Xt8eWDmO4JaDEUbJHioetB2pbH3Y8jJXnwDIbteZpF4Ye8FBnTPNQzNOgIY-zztyOBnCLH6uEbspxienVYPjvhaOzeiXLpg8m4y9S2CozxXPlWbr_3UKyhKyZyrTeF9_sWGsJpKflq7tH5dGfsxja6CQ-tXBagzYFpk57Ofr1gi-WuFGHA/s1400/smoking%20bishop.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="951" data-original-width="1400" height="271" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiuUtTk20cS6Xt8eWDmO4JaDEUbJHioetB2pbH3Y8jJXnwDIbteZpF4Ye8FBnTPNQzNOgIY-zztyOBnCLH6uEbspxienVYPjvhaOzeiXLpg8m4y9S2CozxXPlWbr_3UKyhKyZyrTeF9_sWGsJpKflq7tH5dGfsxja6CQ-tXBagzYFpk57Ofr1gi-WuFGHA/w400-h271/smoking%20bishop.jpg" width="400" /></a></div><br /><span style="font-family: courier;"><br /></span><p></p><p><b><span style="font-family: courier;">What is it?</span></b></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;">Smoking Bishop is a mulled wine made from port wine and roasted spiced citrus fruits. The Victorian cookbook writer Eliza Acton has a recipe in her Modern Cookery for Private Families first published in 1845.</span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;">Eliza Acton deserves to be better known. She was the first in print to refer to plum pudding - that delicious combination of flour, fruits, sugar, spices, brandy and kidney fat - as Christmas Pudding. She also introduced the English speaking world to Spaghetti and to Brussels Sprouts. Now’s not the time to open up an argument between two ladies long since departed but a certain Mrs Isabella Beeton plagiarised quite a few of her recipes. And although I’m firmly team Acton, what’s good enough for Mrs B is certainly good enough for me, so here’s that Acton recipe in full:</span></p><p><i><span style="font-family: courier;">“Make several incisions in the rind of a lemon, stick cloves in these, and roast the lemon by a slow fire. Put small but equal quantities of cinnamon, cloves, mace, and allspice, with a race of ginger, into a saucepan with half a pint of water: let it boil until it is reduced one-half. Boil one bottle of port wine, burn a portion of the spirit out of it by applying a lighted paper to the saucepan; put the roasted lemon and spice into the wine ; stir it up well, and let it stand near the fire ten minutes. Rub a few knobs of sugar on the rind of a lemon, put the sugar into a bowl or jug, with the juice of half a lemon (not roasted), pour the wine into it, grate in some nutmeg, sweeten it to the taste, and serve it up with the lemon and spice floating in it.”</span></i></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;">Those of us not possessed of a slow fire can simulate that step with an oven or that air fryer you bought yourself last Xmas.</span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;">Another delightful fact is that the smoking bishop is but one of a handful of mulled wine recipes in a family known collectively as the Ecclesiastics. They all follow the same pattern as above but have different names according to the wine you use as the base.</span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;">Substitute port for whichever of the following you happen to have in your wine store and change the name:</span></p><p></p><ul style="text-align: left;"><li><span style="font-family: courier;">Claret - smoking archbishop</span></li><li><span style="font-family: courier;">Champagne - smoking cardinal</span></li><li><span style="font-family: courier;">Burgundy - smoking pope</span></li></ul><p></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;">But the one that will be mulling away in the Finnginn slow cooker to greet Xmas guests returning rosy-cheeked from the Boxing Day walk will be the smoking beadle - which has added raisins and is made with that most Xmassy of wines: <a href="https://www.winedealsdirect.co.uk/products/stones-ginger-wine-70cl-wine-deals-direct" target="_blank">Stones Ginger Wine</a>.</span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;"><b>Teetotal Alternative</b></span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;">One for the ankle biters to enjoy alongside the grown-ups is hot Ribena which is made by adding boiling water to blackcurrant squash.</span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;">What are you mulling this Xmas? Can you help us revive the tradition of the smoking bishop? Let us know how you get on in the comments below and on the social media.</span></p><p>Photo by <a href="https://unsplash.com/@wandalust?utm_content=creditCopyText&utm_medium=referral&utm_source=unsplash">Hannah Pemberton</a> on <a href="https://unsplash.com/photos/close-up-photography-of-sliced-orange-fruit-on-brown-cooking-pot-bXi4eg4jyuU?utm_content=creditCopyText&utm_medium=referral&utm_source=unsplash">Unsplash</a></p><p><br /></p>Finnginnhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11408363976804920106noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-191345550099999047.post-86990673274179228962023-12-08T02:39:00.000-08:002023-12-08T02:51:08.112-08:00Finnginn’s Favourite Festive Drinks: Number 7 - Stout<p><span style="font-family: courier;"><br /></span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;">All tastes are acquired, but some tastes take more acquiring than others. No child, mistaking a parent’s glass of dark bubbly stout for a cherry-cola, ever took a sip and thought: “Yes! This is the drink for me!” Liking stout takes practice, and the effort is its own reward.</span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;">A solid bottle of stout is a bit like a solid marriage. With any luck there will be sufficient notes of joyful liquorice, coffee and dark chocolate to prevent the undercurrent of bitterness from overwhelming. </span></p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEias6v4WvA9gdEUBXj5hXtTaEs5S_Bill2urnF0p2wVGsx55gX2tHEidFeCki1HlRA25xqTNrjFU0F3lcnR4Hu8VaUj_o6oitV5t5EW02wKEklwa7Z_UOyx_hPgvfQiQEoF6uEKRqLjn0nFZwP3yVnvmJNhprW2rwryywPdTpPOSS3hRVXs-OGobF1xRUk/s5922/gary-zhang-uTlIebFl-F4-unsplash.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="5922" data-original-width="3861" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEias6v4WvA9gdEUBXj5hXtTaEs5S_Bill2urnF0p2wVGsx55gX2tHEidFeCki1HlRA25xqTNrjFU0F3lcnR4Hu8VaUj_o6oitV5t5EW02wKEklwa7Z_UOyx_hPgvfQiQEoF6uEKRqLjn0nFZwP3yVnvmJNhprW2rwryywPdTpPOSS3hRVXs-OGobF1xRUk/s320/gary-zhang-uTlIebFl-F4-unsplash.jpg" width="209" /></a></div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><p></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;"><b>What is it?</b></span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;">Stout is a dark beer brewed from barley that has been toasted until burnt. For purists, stout is traditionally made with unmalted barley and it is this that distinguishes it from the maltier-tasting porter. But in practice there is a lot of overlap between the two and mixing of malted and unmalted grains to get the desired flavour in the brew.</span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;"><b>Guinness or Murphy's?</b></span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;">The stout with the best international marketing campaign is undoubtedly Guinness. I’ve worked many St Patrick’s Days in an Irish-owned bar, in a typical week we’d order 2-3 barrels of Guinness. For the 17th March we’d order (and sell) an extra 10. People would tell you how much they disliked the drink as they ordered another tray of 4 pints to get their hands on another Gunness-branded tall nylon hat (known unaffectionately in the trade as a wanker hat). </span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;">The stout with the best local marketing campaign is undoubtedly Murphy’s. I accidentally moved to County Cork briefly in the late 1990s (a story for another time). The town I lived and worked in - Youghal (pronounced like the American second person plural pronoun: “y’all”) - was the only town in Ireland where Murphy’s stout outsold the brand leader Guinness. As a reward, the brewery ran a loyalty card scheme where for every three pints you drank you got a fourth free. The stickers and cards were like a second currency in the town that summer.</span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;"><b>When to drink stout</b></span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;">Back to Christmas day - veg prepped, turkey’s in the oven - you’ve got a couple of hours before the spuds need to go on. For me, this is the perfect time to pop down your local boozer for a pint or - if your luck’s in - a bottle of Guinness. Bottled Guinness (sold as <a href="https://www.guinness.com/en-gb/beers/guinness-original" target="_blank">Guinness Original</a> in the UK) is a lovely bitter stout with a sharper effervescence than the nitrogen bubbles that give its draft cousin its famous creamy head. A delicious mid-winter warmer.</span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;"><b>(Nearly*) Teetotal Alternative: Kvass</b></span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;">Did you ever take a bite of an Eastern European rye bread and think: “My god! If only this was available in drink form!”? Well then you need to get some Kvass - the drink that tastes like bread - in your drinks cabinet. You can even <a href="https://www.fermentingforfoodies.com/traditonal-sourdough-kvass/" target="_blank">make your own Kvass</a>.</span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;"><b>*</b>The minimal research that I do for this blog informs me that the fermentation process leads to trace amounts of alcohol in Kvass - but they give it to children in Russia - so you’ll probably be alright. </span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;">What do you drink in the pub at Christmas time? Let us know in the comments below or on the social media.</span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;"><br /></span></p><p>Photo by <a href="https://unsplash.com/@novamiracle?utm_content=creditCopyText&utm_medium=referral&utm_source=unsplash">Gary Zhang</a> on <a href="https://unsplash.com/photos/a-glass-of-beer-sitting-on-top-of-a-wooden-table-uTlIebFl-F4?utm_content=creditCopyText&utm_medium=referral&utm_source=unsplash">Unsplash</a></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;"></span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;"> </span></p><div><br /></div>Finnginnhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11408363976804920106noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-191345550099999047.post-40278678653111332702023-12-05T04:28:00.000-08:002023-12-05T06:32:05.093-08:00Finnginn’s Favourite Festive Drinks: Number 8 - Buck’s Fizz<p><span style="font-family: courier;"></span></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><span style="font-family: courier;">Like a once-beloved sitcom whose protagonists haven’t aged well, this blog likes to return for the Xmas Specials in the hope that some audience approval ratings and a favourable broadsheet review will mean getting greenlighted for a series in the new year. </span></div><p style="text-align: left;"><span style="font-family: courier;">Last Advent, we probed the murkier depths of my Xmas music playlist for some forgotten and <a href="https://www.finnginn.co.uk/2022/12/finnginns-festive-countdown-number-8.html" target="_blank">some best-forgotten Xmas classics</a>. This year I’m dusting off my bartender’s tasting notes to review some of my favourite Xmas drinks. Feel free to drink responsibly along - and we’ll be including non-alcoholic alternatives for anyone who happens to be reading this blog whilst pregnant, driving, under age, hungover or just not in the mood for booze. </span></p><p style="text-align: left;"><span style="font-family: courier;">As <strike>Jimmy Saville</strike> Dave Lee Travis might have been overheard saying in 1981: At Number 8: it’s <b>Buck’s Fizz…</b></span></p><p style="text-align: left;"><span style="font-family: courier;"></span></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: courier;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgDN4zMi-KfgaBNR6Y2Nc7-symmU_kRpehrZWaGmktbg3NDsK8nsMF489wEXE079WV95FwA0WFcY5A_Mw0aZ-SnG-66cnKhWIyCFa-qwTjaj7www2tOZ3X6MuK015WMa-_ZHo46nuweITmOpol4VfuO1C9WkKxd9bAhVeAUohRw0E7sy_NCV1f00JYYla8/s5760/brooke-lark-d-SeLxF_QF0-unsplash.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="5760" data-original-width="3840" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgDN4zMi-KfgaBNR6Y2Nc7-symmU_kRpehrZWaGmktbg3NDsK8nsMF489wEXE079WV95FwA0WFcY5A_Mw0aZ-SnG-66cnKhWIyCFa-qwTjaj7www2tOZ3X6MuK015WMa-_ZHo46nuweITmOpol4VfuO1C9WkKxd9bAhVeAUohRw0E7sy_NCV1f00JYYla8/s320/brooke-lark-d-SeLxF_QF0-unsplash.jpg" width="213" /></a></span></div><span style="font-family: courier;"><br /><b><br /></b></span><p></p><p style="text-align: left;"><b><span style="font-family: courier;">What is it?</span></b></p><p style="text-align: left;"><span style="font-family: courier;">Buck’s Fizz is a mixture of sparkling wine and orange juice. Get out your biggest jug, slowly pour in an entire bottle of bubbly and top up with OJ to taste. This is a great pre-breakfast drink for parents to drown out thoughts of over-commercialisation as they watch their kids tear the paper from the carefully thought out educational stocking fillers and cast them aside in favour of the selection box of Cadbury bars. </span></p><p style="text-align: left;"><span style="font-family: courier;">Even if you can afford to drink Champagne, it seems a bit of a shame to be drowning an expensive bottle in a carton of ‘made from concentrate’. Far better to save the champers for toasting the <strike>Queen’s</strike> King’s Speech. If you can’t afford to toast with Champagne, <a href="https://www.majestic.co.uk/cremant-sparkling-wine" target="_blank">Cremant</a> is your friend here.</span></p><p style="text-align: left;"><span style="font-family: courier;">But for true value for money in your Buck’s Fizz (and naturally I’m ruling out those dreadful pre-mixed bottles here - we have standards on this blog) you’re going to want to get yourself a bottle or three of Lidl’s <a href="https://www.lidl.co.uk/p/arestel-cava-brut/p10009087" target="_blank">Arastel Cava Brut</a> (currently priced around the £5.50 mark but frequently discounted in the build up to Xmas). I’m open to a sponsorship deal if anyone from Lidl wants to send me a case.</span></p><p style="text-align: left;"><span style="font-family: courier;">Then the trick is to up your Orange Juice game. Forget cartons, forget even the branded ‘not from concentrate’. Go out and source some large oranges and extract the juice from them. If you have one, you can use a juicer for this purpose. If you don’t have one - word to the wise - don’t buy your girlfriend one for Xmas.</span></p><p style="text-align: left;"><span style="font-family: courier;">(Before we were married, I thought it would be a good idea to buy my partner a juicer for Xmas one year. This turned out to be a terrible idea because a juicer comes in a big box. So naturally, she thought the giant wrapped box was secretly containing a little box with a diamond ring in it. Imagine her disappointment when the giant box actually contained a giant juicing machine! Still once a year, I dust it off to make the best damned Buck’s Fizz you’ll ever taste!)</span></p><p style="text-align: left;"><b><span style="font-family: courier;">Teetotal Alternative: St Clements</span></b></p><p style="text-align: left;"><span style="font-family: courier;">British readers will be familiar with the nursery rhyme that starts with the sweet refrain “Oranges and lemons say the bells of St Clements” and ends with the brutal beheading of a child by candlelight. This mocktail cleverly draws its name from the friendlier end of this rhyme and is a combination of equal parts: <a href="https://www.drinksupermarket.com/schweppes-bitter-lemon-24x-150ml" target="_blank">Schweppes Bitter Lemon</a> and Orange Juice. </span></p><p style="text-align: left;"><span style="font-family: courier;">What do you like to drink Xmas morning? Leave your comments below or on Facebook.</span></p><p style="text-align: left;">(Photo by <a href="https://unsplash.com/@brookelark?utm_content=creditCopyText&utm_medium=referral&utm_source=unsplash">Brooke Lark</a> on <a href="https://unsplash.com/photos/orange-liquid-on-clear-drinking-glasses-d-SeLxF_QF0?utm_content=creditCopyText&utm_medium=referral&utm_source=unsplash">Unsplash</a>)</p><p style="text-align: left;"><span style="font-family: courier;"><br /></span></p><p style="text-align: left;"><span style="font-family: courier;"> </span></p>Finnginnhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11408363976804920106noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-191345550099999047.post-13137250490171681482022-12-23T08:19:00.001-08:002022-12-23T08:19:15.807-08:00Finnginn's Festive Countdown: Number One<p><span style="font-family: courier;"></span></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: courier;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhdYobEM3h8Mtb2N4aGECKWceKWS850FHk7oCA1sWEqGrrlShuA5_WrJFR_FcoKRs4aZEQTG-BF6JNNQrsQ29jXJRnBsODbf7S5A7Dm4vxznN8IrDQmGKM0IKzIRkZFjY8UgBAEb6rnG_fTp7RVABBgPiZcP9Reuuw8qMSHZ_yIxGpSqEBohNB140nq/s900/bigstock-Number---Colorful-Yellow-Bur-466755765.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="506" data-original-width="900" height="225" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhdYobEM3h8Mtb2N4aGECKWceKWS850FHk7oCA1sWEqGrrlShuA5_WrJFR_FcoKRs4aZEQTG-BF6JNNQrsQ29jXJRnBsODbf7S5A7Dm4vxznN8IrDQmGKM0IKzIRkZFjY8UgBAEb6rnG_fTp7RVABBgPiZcP9Reuuw8qMSHZ_yIxGpSqEBohNB140nq/w400-h225/bigstock-Number---Colorful-Yellow-Bur-466755765.jpg" width="400" /></a></span></div><span style="font-family: courier;"><br />I spent what I could of today listening to my Xmas playlist and choosing something appropriate for the number one slot. There were a few contenders and if I was writing this on a different day, it might easily have been a different result.</span><p></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;">Compiling a list like this has really helped me to define what I like in an Xmas tune. I particularly like genre takes on classics. I have developed a strong taste for military style snare-heavy drumbeats. And you can’t go wrong with a pretentious Latin title and a bonkers angelic inspiration. </span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;"><b>Number One: In Dulci Jubilo by Mike Oldfield</b></span></p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><iframe allowfullscreen="" class="BLOG_video_class" height="266" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/GVR4qpt176Y" width="320" youtube-src-id="GVR4qpt176Y"></iframe></div><br /><span style="font-family: courier;"><br /></span><p></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;">I feel an extra appreciation for this work of genius is added by being able to view Pan's People's dance interpretation from 1975's Top of the Pops. My Xmas gift to you all.</span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;">The tune’s history is pretty interesting too. </span><span style="font-family: courier;">I recommend listening to a choral arrangement such as this <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MrweXsImVhg" target="_blank">one by the choir at King’s College</a> and you’ll hear Pearsall's partly English translation of the words and music that dates from the 14th Century.</span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;">German Mystic Heinrich Seuse wrote down the music he heard angels singing in a vision brought on by mortification - an extreme religious practice for which Heinrich Seuse invented and wore underpants studded with 150 inward facing brass nails. They really knew how to get close to God in the 14th Century. </span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;">The underpant craze remained a niche practice, but the song really caught on. JS Bach loved the song so much that he wrote a <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=t0WQzTqNE4k" target="_blank">prelude for organ (JBV729)</a>.</span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;">You might think that such a distinguished musical pedigree might put off the average prog rock studio musician, but Mike Oldfield realised that there was a banging tune hiding in <i>In Dulce Jubilo</i> - it just needed speeding up and the addition of two slightly stifled electric guitars and some snare drums.</span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;">Well, this has been a gas, can’t believe that I have managed to write all eight of these before Xmas! It's kept me sane whilst also writing hundreds of near identical corporate Christmas messages for my day job writing the internet. </span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;">Thanks to everyone who’s got involved and joined in the comments and shared their favourite Xmas tunes and their opinions on my choices. I hope the list has provoked thought more than it has disappointed.</span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;">Happy Xmas everyone!</span></p><div><br /></div>Finnginnhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11408363976804920106noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-191345550099999047.post-10321006395708322972022-12-22T03:25:00.003-08:002022-12-22T03:36:24.138-08:00Finnginn's Festive Countdown: Number 2<p><span style="font-family: courier;"></span></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: courier;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgCOmRXYkJwJVZ8kAsZ_n1p5nR0TDLDDjYOhXQS9wZ2O4AY_Dlh7S4e4upfFijQjFuExX5eWH2doece7EB0LHswtTNkjOS1zFOR7XJkirg_N00FKTxyTpn6hl45RKeC8t0T-p_9Vmy0KrEU2nehzntgX6TNvC6R4l2ftPZWnhqN_L_k1mUfdMut2eiG/s900/bigstock-Cover-For-Advent-Calendar-Gre-440315000.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="846" data-original-width="900" height="376" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgCOmRXYkJwJVZ8kAsZ_n1p5nR0TDLDDjYOhXQS9wZ2O4AY_Dlh7S4e4upfFijQjFuExX5eWH2doece7EB0LHswtTNkjOS1zFOR7XJkirg_N00FKTxyTpn6hl45RKeC8t0T-p_9Vmy0KrEU2nehzntgX6TNvC6R4l2ftPZWnhqN_L_k1mUfdMut2eiG/w400-h376/bigstock-Cover-For-Advent-Calendar-Gre-440315000.jpg" width="400" /></a></span></div><span style="font-family: courier;"><br />Some songs happen to have been popular at Xmastime, but have little discernible Xmas content or theme: Here in the UK, East 17's <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-wNhdjoF-6M" target="_blank">Stay Another Day</a> is a case in point - sleigh bells notwithstanding. My mum, who has been following this countdown closely, keeps messaging me to remind me of the existence of David Essex’s <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J3c18V3ChIs">A Winter's Tale</a> (which I can exclusively reveal has not made the number one spot). Even <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-aQw3DoGuqs" target="_blank">Jingle Bells</a> is pretty heavy on the delights of winter equestrianism and light on any actual Xmas references.</span><p></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;">Because Xmas music is a fuzzy category, there are plenty of songs that can be in or out of the set depending on who’s making the distinctions. </span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;">When I worked as a bartender, back in the days of CDs, we had the <i>Best of the Pogues</i> album behind the bar. Inevitably, if ever the familiar piano chords of the opening track would start to play, you could guarantee some member of the public would pipe up: “Why are you playing Christmas music in July?” But for me, <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j9jbdgZidu8" target="_blank">A Fairytale of New York</a> is a Xmas song that is not just for Xmas - it’s great all year round. </span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;">But Fairytale of New York is not the Pogues’ best Xmas song. That honour goes to…</span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;"><b>Number 2: Dark Streets of London by the Pogues</b></span></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><iframe allowfullscreen="" class="BLOG_video_class" height="266" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/XNQpMCxh-ww" width="320" youtube-src-id="XNQpMCxh-ww"></iframe></div><br /><p><br /></p><p><br /></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;"><i>“Now the winter comes down, I can't stand the chill</i></span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;"><i>That comes to the streets around Christmastime.</i></span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;"><i>I'm buggered to damnation and I haven't got a penny</i></span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;"><i>To wander the dark streets of London.”</i></span></p><div><br /></div><div><span style="font-family: courier;">Honourable mention should go to <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-yCCxbZ4i1E" target="_blank">Thousands Are Sailing</a> which is frequently my favourite Pogues track and includes the line <i>"...from rooms that daylight never sees, where lights don't glow on Christmas trees..." </i>I feel like Shane Macgowan really had a handle on Xmas lyrically and wasn't afraid to reference it in unexpected places, including songs about failed relationships, troubled souls feeling lonely in capital cities, and the Irish immigrant experience in the 19th and 20th centuries. </span></div><div><span style="font-family: courier;"><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-family: courier;">Have I missed any Pogues Christmas references? Let me know in the comments here or on Facebook.</span></div>Finnginnhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11408363976804920106noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-191345550099999047.post-73921970882904967272022-12-21T03:08:00.007-08:002022-12-21T03:10:57.687-08:00Finnginn's Festive Countdown: Number 3<p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjFvgvcwgnewDQ12I2QpHgPqAj7fY2I8ZTtsdip-cGT8k7KNvpxq_vf5edeug7G1SlzQCaDMgnCa9WmgMzdfnAb3mp-b4YqnalHjK6zXIuCKAIvnITaqnMjlJS-FmdaJg8Vf6jMDrql0bz0yDRsw8UDqop4pzPeRtlpmoFkQ5FYNAWTEXhHnVn9zr-k/s900/bigstock-Number--Three-Golden-Celebrat-459282061.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="601" data-original-width="900" height="268" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjFvgvcwgnewDQ12I2QpHgPqAj7fY2I8ZTtsdip-cGT8k7KNvpxq_vf5edeug7G1SlzQCaDMgnCa9WmgMzdfnAb3mp-b4YqnalHjK6zXIuCKAIvnITaqnMjlJS-FmdaJg8Vf6jMDrql0bz0yDRsw8UDqop4pzPeRtlpmoFkQ5FYNAWTEXhHnVn9zr-k/w400-h268/bigstock-Number--Three-Golden-Celebrat-459282061.jpg" width="400" /></a></div><br /><span style="font-family: courier;"><br /></span><p></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;">In the minimal research that I conduct to lend this blog an air of credibility, I read that this song only reached number 40 in the UK charts. It has only become familiar because it is used as filler on so many Xmas Hits records, CDs and… er… festive countdowns.</span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;">Chris de Burgh may be best remembered for his saccharine ballads about rubbing cheeks with scarlet clad ladies, but we’re here to celebrate the strand of bonkers religiosity hiding in that falsetto croon. <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DnaUvPoiTfQ" target="_blank">Spanish Train</a> - in which the Devil outwits God by cheating at games of poker and chess over which they have wagered the souls of the dead - was a favourite of mine as a child. But this is a festive countdown so today’s song can only be:</span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;"><b>Number 3: A Spaceman Came Travelling by Chris de Burgh</b></span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;"></span></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: courier;"><iframe allowfullscreen="" class="BLOG_video_class" height="266" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/GmZg7tvGN9o" width="320" youtube-src-id="GmZg7tvGN9o"></iframe></span></div><span style="font-family: courier;"><br /><b><br /></b></span><p></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;">In my view, A Spaceman Came Travelling is a song in three parts:</span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;"><b>Part One</b> is the set-up: a grade one reimagining of the Nativity story in which the star that guides shepherd folk and wise men to Bethlehem is not a star at all but an alien spacecraft bearing a message for mankind to hear. This is brilliantly Christmassy - if there’s one Christmas song element that we are fans of here at the Finnginn blog, it’s reimaginings of the Nativity story. We love it when songwriters are like: <i>The Greatest Story Ever Told? Nah, it would be better if it went like this...</i></span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;"><b>Part Two</b> is a bit of a letdown as the spaceman reveals that his message is:</span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;"><i>“...blah blah blah blah, la-la, blah blah blah blah…” </i></span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;">Lyrically, it’s like Chris thought, ‘I’ll write that bit later’ and then never did.</span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;">But the song is redeemed in Part Three when the stranger/spaceman character departs leaving only the cryptic hint that:</span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;"><i>“...when 2000 years of your time has gone by,</i></span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;"><i> this song will begin once again…” </i></span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;">That’s right! The twist is that you’re not listening to a Chris de Burgh festive pop song at all - you are actually hearing the interstellar music of the angel-being that blessed the birth of Jesus! </span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;">It’s this incredible hubris that earns A Spaceman Came Travelling a prominent place in my Christmas playlist.</span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;"><br /></span></p><p><br /></p>Finnginnhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11408363976804920106noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-191345550099999047.post-74137201329224561682022-12-20T02:43:00.000-08:002022-12-20T07:09:49.238-08:00Finnginn's Festive Countdown: Number 4<p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgzmvP1ugNh6vj6fbVG95y47NeyAqujC-D8h7ELoKZdca2PegClxYcYTFAz-6BNbW24YZ-sSYQbY7r261KcvqB1IvHrZYwCHlo3WNCQF_7N-N06DqAOmACPhmkr7YkfIZ6ssDATH-4AGRZ83V88gdfuxh4m6EIO3ynPUGbw65l5WbfCwS8oO94-d_vr/s900/bigstock-Candle-Of-The-Fourth-Advent-Bu-464835653.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="675" data-original-width="900" height="300" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgzmvP1ugNh6vj6fbVG95y47NeyAqujC-D8h7ELoKZdca2PegClxYcYTFAz-6BNbW24YZ-sSYQbY7r261KcvqB1IvHrZYwCHlo3WNCQF_7N-N06DqAOmACPhmkr7YkfIZ6ssDATH-4AGRZ83V88gdfuxh4m6EIO3ynPUGbw65l5WbfCwS8oO94-d_vr/w400-h300/bigstock-Candle-Of-The-Fourth-Advent-Bu-464835653.jpg" width="400"></a></div><br><span style="font-family: courier;"><br></span><p></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;">I’m slightly behind schedule on these. Looks like I’ve got to publish one on most of the days left between now and Xmas otherwise I will be breaking my own rule that Xmas music should only be listened to during Advent and on Xmas day itself.</span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;">The Kinks have long been a favourite band of mine. They had a string of hit singles in the 1960s: starting with two - <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fTTsY-oz6Go" target="_blank">You Really Got Me</a> and <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fOGMRnKl5co" target="_blank">All Day and All of the Night</a> - that kind of invented the chord-heavy riff metal sound before completely abandoning it in pursuit of a character-led almost theatrical style of music.</span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;">Many of the 1970s Kinks albums are <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Lnw0KNfSr4w" target="_blank">overly-long single-concept</a> albums that play out like stage plays. They took to touring with a full brass section and their stage shows featured actors and multiple costume changes. Record sales dwindled until they reinvented themselves as a stadium act in the 1980s, drawing on their huge back catalogue to play just the hits to packed crowds.</span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;">At the peak of their late 1970s unpopularity. They released a Christmas song:</span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;"><b>Number 4: Father Christmas by the Kinks</b></span></p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><iframe allowfullscreen="" class="BLOG_video_class" height="266" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/fPPCPqDINEk" width="320" youtube-src-id="fPPCPqDINEk"></iframe></div><br><span style="font-family: courier;"><br></span><p></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;">The christmassy glockenspiel intro gives way to a trademark Dave Davies guitar peel. Lead singer Ray Davies sings the song from the perspective of a mall santa who tells the story of a time he was mugged by a gang of children who taunt him with the central refrain:</span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;"><i>“Father Christmas, give us some money</i></span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;"><i>Don't mess around with those silly toys</i></span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;"><i>We'll beat you up if you don't hand it over</i></span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;"><i>We want your bread so don't make us annoyed.</i></span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;"><i>Give all the toys to the little rich boys!”</i></span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;">In 1977, pipe bands not glockenspiels were the Christmas music theme du jour, so Paul McCartney’s ode to his estate in the Scottish lowlands, <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Plhtk_XJqhM" target="_blank">Mull of Kintyre</a> got the number one spot. This Kinks song failed to chart. </span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;">What are your favourite forgotten Christmas anthems? Let me know in the comments below or on Facebook.</span></p><div><br></div>Finnginnhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11408363976804920106noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-191345550099999047.post-76936018333455768332022-12-15T07:30:00.002-08:002022-12-15T07:30:19.837-08:00Finnginn's Festive Countdown: Number 5<p><span style="font-family: courier;"></span></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: courier;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhVY6x53TuGSplzkeV3Q7-KelckyVS0E3V5w6PHttwUpXZHo1GEIWzSVSIsydIYrfymRHpuNbfpF7epehat9GidKir0kJxS_zgMUyaOW5Bp4Y925x4fKhGl5uUJ33JyyQO-ivNgHUfoBS-13ZJ_1Kqczb7w3a6H29XJp78DRfhJ8x6BQhhND6-BJ-U2/s900/bigstock-The--Days-Of-Christmas--th--465971137.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="525" data-original-width="900" height="234" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhVY6x53TuGSplzkeV3Q7-KelckyVS0E3V5w6PHttwUpXZHo1GEIWzSVSIsydIYrfymRHpuNbfpF7epehat9GidKir0kJxS_zgMUyaOW5Bp4Y925x4fKhGl5uUJ33JyyQO-ivNgHUfoBS-13ZJ_1Kqczb7w3a6H29XJp78DRfhJ8x6BQhhND6-BJ-U2/w400-h234/bigstock-The--Days-Of-Christmas--th--465971137.jpg" width="400" /></a></span></div><span style="font-family: courier;"><br />Christina Aguilera and I are about the same age (she’s actually like six weeks older than me). Fascinatingly, we both also have a four octave vocal range… only kidding… in reality, the similarities end at the age thing. </span><p></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;">Despite our similar ages, our paths hadn’t crossed. She never invites me to her birthday parties - so I don’t invite her to my traditional birthday curry night at Spice Paradise (meeting at the King’s Head at 7 for food at 8 if you’re free, Christina) either. Maybe because Christina’s birthday is so close to Christmas is the reason that she hates Christmas so much?</span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;">My evidence for Christina Aguilera’s hatred of Christmas is the worst Christmas album I’ve suffered through in all my research for this festive countdown. <i>My Kind of Christmas</i> was released in 2000. An album so keen to put that four octave vocal range to the test that the producers decided to make every syllable 17 notes long. Even <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=veMcMsOEsiA" target="_blank">a duet with Dr John</a> can’t save it.</span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;">My Kind of Christmas’ only redeeming feature is a bizarre interlude -<i> <a href="https://youtu.be/-DlOj1Kp2Y4" target="_blank">Xtina's Xmas</a></i> - that sounds like it was produced by a Sixth Former who, whilst doing work experience at a studio had stumbled across the record company executive’s stash of Colombian talcum powder and then been let loose at the mixing desk.</span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;">Maybe My Kind of Christmas is your kind of Christmas. But after listening to that, I needed a good blast of a track that just weeps Christmas spirit from its pores...</span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;"><br /></span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;"><b>Number 5: Gaudete by Steeleye Span</b></span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;"><br /></span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;">In the house I grew up in, Steeleye Span used to play whilst the children opened their stockings on Christmas morning. But if ever a song was recorded to be played during the lighting and presentation of the Christmas Pudding, surely this is it?</span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;">(For my international readers: the traditional British Christmas Pudding is made of dried fruit, nuts, spices and kidney fat soaked in brandy for four weeks, then dressed with a sprig of holly, doused in more brandy and set on fire.)</span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;"><br /></span></p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><iframe allowfullscreen="" class="BLOG_video_class" height="266" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/bTbq2pPLW6I" width="320" youtube-src-id="bTbq2pPLW6I"></iframe></div><br /><span style="font-family: courier;"><br /></span><p></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;"><br /></span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;"><i>Gaudete! Gaudete! Christus est natus!</i></span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;"><i>Ex Maria virgine! Gaudete!</i></span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;"><br /></span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;"><i>[Rejoice all! Rejoice all! Christ is born!</i></span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;"><i>Outside of the virgin Mary! Rejoice all!] </i></span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;">(trans. author’s own)</span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;"><br /></span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;">Feel free to share with me your favourite latin Christmas songs. Drop them in the comments here or on Facebook.</span></p><div><br /></div><div><br /></div>Finnginnhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11408363976804920106noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-191345550099999047.post-55845348594750099422022-12-09T03:46:00.003-08:002022-12-09T07:31:42.613-08:00Finnginn's Festive Countdown: Number 6<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgWAnujQXwi0TBwcta9NJ3fM6oMsa1T5f0GqB0BdeXxWGH8w5J8Q9gifXRW_HK_sYMsTpfaCmr8Ftl9u_8xDeU7jD9F2gMZ_bXXrAzFcGdNj1tl1qnLdgZyH_g0Pw-DyBadmShfRDqc5Cq2-NoGk8BuGyBgV8LMLWOf6iUI-lKaOrvsOhNCyVsKq1Wl/s6000/bigstock-Christmas-Countdown-Gold-Numb-406457372.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="4000" data-original-width="6000" height="266" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgWAnujQXwi0TBwcta9NJ3fM6oMsa1T5f0GqB0BdeXxWGH8w5J8Q9gifXRW_HK_sYMsTpfaCmr8Ftl9u_8xDeU7jD9F2gMZ_bXXrAzFcGdNj1tl1qnLdgZyH_g0Pw-DyBadmShfRDqc5Cq2-NoGk8BuGyBgV8LMLWOf6iUI-lKaOrvsOhNCyVsKq1Wl/w400-h266/bigstock-Christmas-Countdown-Gold-Numb-406457372.jpg" width="400"></a></div><br><p><br></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;">My annual YouTube Music listening statistics came through and, once again, I am in the top 2% of Bob Dylan listeners globally - in 2022, I listened to 371 minutes of Bob Dylan. If that puts me in the top 2%, y’all aren’t listening to enough Dylan.</span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;">But even we super-Dylan listeners find our fingers hovering over the ‘skip song’ button when his rasping ineffectual rendition of <i><a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1wwxZTDPc7M" target="_blank">Do You Hear What I Hear?</a></i> from 2009’s <i>Christmas in the Heart</i> starts playing.</span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;"><i>Do You Hear What I Hear?</i> has been covered many times since it was written by two musicians (Noël Regney and Gloria Shayne) during October 1962. You heard me correctly - Regney and Shayne came up with their choral masterpiece during the Cuban Missile Crisis. Knowing that they thought the world was ending, makes the song’s central message all the more poignant.</span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;">Plot-wise not much is going on in Do You Hear What I Hear? Essentially, various protagonists (Night Wind, Little Lamb, Shepherd Boy, Mighty King) share various aspects of the Nativity story until the Mighty King proclaims peace and goodwill to the people everywhere. </span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;">This is in stark contrast to the actual Nativity story, in which you will recall that the Mighty King on hearing the news of Christ’s birth orders the slaughter of all boys under 2 years of age in the entire kingdom. (Matt 2:16)</span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;">I’ve listened to this song a lot this week. And I can tell you that it turns out that Dylan’s cover is far from the worst. That honour goes to the <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3LqRw-ynHNw" target="_blank">Jessie J and Mary J Blige version</a> some mixes of which last a full 5 and a half minutes! They linger so long on presenting the Christ-child with silver and gold that I started to doubt Jessie J’s earlier protestations that it was not about the money money money and the ba-bling ba-bling. </span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;">William Becket has <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ANI1xedjjn4" target="_blank">a version</a> that I first encoutered on an album called Punk goes Christmas that manages to achieve a sound that is neither punky nor Christmassy.</span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;">So what am I looking for in my search for the perfect rendition of <i>Do You Hear What I Hear?</i> The song benefits from being tight. The <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ADj-Ru3JQp0" target="_blank">original recording by the Harry Simeone Chorale</a> is magical and only 3 minutes long. <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b5WhWmPxI5I" target="_blank">Mahalia Jackson belts it out</a> in just 2 minutes 20, but she chose a musical rather than vocal echo on the Do You Hear What I Hear? bits so she narrowly misses out to:</span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;"><b>Number 6: Do You Hear What I Hear? by Andy Williams</b></span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;">From the prominent military snare drum to the sustained final note, Andy’s version has everything that we’re looking for. And is supported by a female choir doing the echoey bits and a male voice choir adding some baritone harmonies. Gradually, extra elements (including some Christmassy sounding tubular bells, and an orchestra and brass section) are introduced with the whole never becoming too bloated.</span></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><iframe allowfullscreen="" class="BLOG_video_class" height="266" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/Em0P9zb3a3k" width="320" youtube-src-id="Em0P9zb3a3k"></iframe></div><br><p><span style="font-family: courier;"><i>Said the little lamb to the shepherd boy,</i></span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;"><i>“Do you hear what I hear?</i></span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;"><i>(Do you hear what I hear?)”</i></span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;"><i><br></i></span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;">Think you hate this song? There's a version for you out there somewhere. Share your favourites in the comments below or on Facebook. But forgive me if I listen to them next Xmas - I've kind of done this one to death this week in researching this blog!</span></p><div><br></div>Finnginnhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11408363976804920106noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-191345550099999047.post-66431669535825177792022-12-06T03:30:00.002-08:002022-12-06T04:42:19.780-08:00Finnginn's Festive Countdown: Number 7<div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjiKW7HBhI6WQEESCrfSRbkjUbvXCPzXcdLEvyGlQaqkIb_2LJ2O65DBj4LyCFqeK7xYQW1EKWqVeFDjoo_O0pSYFk8aKk1i8BNvz53LmrRU1_2yPMEg7dapb4hPPmkxGob4u1LZql7CNiKX9PFUuvGdqRDmleHqEmBuRKOn5wFzSzJawmHpkc-9gLd/s1600/bigstock-Creative-Congratulations-From--455064519.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="958" data-original-width="1600" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjiKW7HBhI6WQEESCrfSRbkjUbvXCPzXcdLEvyGlQaqkIb_2LJ2O65DBj4LyCFqeK7xYQW1EKWqVeFDjoo_O0pSYFk8aKk1i8BNvz53LmrRU1_2yPMEg7dapb4hPPmkxGob4u1LZql7CNiKX9PFUuvGdqRDmleHqEmBuRKOn5wFzSzJawmHpkc-9gLd/w400-h240/bigstock-Creative-Congratulations-From--455064519.jpg" width="400" /></a></div><br /><span style="font-family: courier;"><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-family: courier;"><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-family: courier;">Calypso music is unashamedly joyful music - so it’s a shoo-in for adding some sunshine to your Xmas playlist. And luckily Calypsonians love Xmas so there’s albums of the stuff out there to choose from. </span></div><div><div><span style="font-family: courier;"><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-family: courier;">Calypso music is also <a href="https://artsandculture.google.com/story/the-dawn-of-calypso-notting-hill-carnival/uAWRguvb_PRR7g?hl=en" target="_blank">unashamedly subversive music</a> - stemming from the musical tradition of enslaved Africans in the Caribbean using call and response work songs to mock their slavemasters. </span></div><div><span style="font-family: courier;"><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-family: courier;"><b>Number 7: Father Christmas by Lord Kitchener</b></span></div><div><span style="font-family: courier;"><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-family: courier;">Lord Kitchener is referred to by Wikipedia as Lord Kitchener (calypsonian) to make sure nobody accidentally confuses the grandmaster of calypso for the moustachioed face staring out of the “Your Country Needs You!” First World War recruitment poster.</span></div></div><div><span style="font-family: courier;"><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-family: courier;">Be sure to check out his back catalogue. Lord Kitchener knows all the tricks in the calypso lyric handbook - sociopolitical commentary, humour, double-entendre, the experience of being black in a racist world - all set to beautiful calypso music which is a uniquely Trinidadian fusion of African beats and Latin-American rhythms. </span></div><div><span style="font-family: courier;"><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-family: courier;">According to his <a href="https://www.theguardian.com/news/2000/feb/12/guardianobituaries" target="_blank">obituary in the Guardian</a> he arrived in England on the Empire Windrush in 1948 and stayed here for 14 years - opening a nightclub in Manchester. </span></div><div><br /></div><iframe frameborder="0" height="360" src="https://youtube.com/embed/RJcEsw0XJAQ" width="480"></iframe><div><br /></div><div><div><br /></div><div><i>“Last night you said to me what I want for Christmas?</i></div><div><i>Darling, it’s nice to see you are so generous.</i></div><div><i>Well, boy, take it from me your offer is welcome:</i></div><div><i>Bring the wine, the whisky and the rum!”</i></div></div><div><br /></div>Finnginnhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11408363976804920106noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-191345550099999047.post-25776145094104228902022-12-02T05:22:00.001-08:002022-12-02T05:24:46.829-08:00Finnginn's Festive Countdown: Number 8<p><span style="font-family: courier;"></span></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: courier;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgdoJkpd2HXEtPnklV80AusQJm1p943AMEDlIWahzmQZJqpsPoFYtvLffQZumMb13zLX2xGf7jIopqUm0eIK1orZ76B__g84GDgLNCQlQACKPuzooGbcjw_vlyt7Libi-HAvlP2ddNuGUIhJFUfQqhuQFVlG-pL95xEvrkCJT24l1WNNNUqOrM8M3gj/s1600/bigstock-The--Days-Of-Christmas--th--465684383.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="933" data-original-width="1600" height="234" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgdoJkpd2HXEtPnklV80AusQJm1p943AMEDlIWahzmQZJqpsPoFYtvLffQZumMb13zLX2xGf7jIopqUm0eIK1orZ76B__g84GDgLNCQlQACKPuzooGbcjw_vlyt7Libi-HAvlP2ddNuGUIhJFUfQqhuQFVlG-pL95xEvrkCJT24l1WNNNUqOrM8M3gj/w400-h234/bigstock-The--Days-Of-Christmas--th--465684383.jpg" width="400" /></a></span></div><span style="font-family: courier;"><br />Confession time: I love Xmas music. I’m not ashamed to say that the first 7” single I ever owned was Cliff Richard’s Mistletoe and Wine and that at least 50% of the theme of that chorus-line plays an important part in my Xmas celebrations to this day. </span><p></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;">I have two ideas that I think would improve the whole Xmas music experience for everyone.</span></p><p></p><ol style="text-align: left;"><li><span style="font-family: courier;">Xmas music should only be played during Advent and on Xmas Day itself.</span></li><li><span style="font-family: courier;">We should all deviate from the standard playlist a bit more - let’s hear more Xmas deep cuts.</span></li></ol><p></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;">For those who love Xmas music as much as me, and for all the grinches who wish they could avoid stepping into last Christmas everyday, I present Finnginn’s Festive Countdown.</span></p><p><b><span style="font-family: courier;">Number 8: It’s Always Christmas Time for Visa by The Austin Lounge Lizards. </span></b></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;">There can be few genres more divisive than comedy gospel bluegrass. Let’s just say it’s not for everyone. </span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;">I first heard the Austin lounge Lizards when I was working as a campboy in the United States in the late 90s. A Texan guitar slinger called Uh…Clem used to sing a cover of their song Monkey on My Back (And It Looks Like You) round the campfire at the Cotopaxi Smokehouse. When I returned to England, he gave me as a parting gift a cassette tape that had their album Employee of the Month on one side and a live album by the <a href="https://asylumstreetspankers.bandcamp.com/" target="_blank">Asylum Street Spankers</a> on the other. </span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;">In the years since, I have tracked down some other records of theirs. Not much of their back catalogue has made it to the digital era. Only about half of their 10 or so albums are on YouTube Music.</span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;">Luckily one of them includes this catchy seasonal reminder that the credit card companies are out to exploit you…</span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;"><br /></span></p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><iframe allowfullscreen="" class="BLOG_video_class" height="266" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/HYDdSxuL_Ss" width="320" youtube-src-id="HYDdSxuL_Ss"></iframe></div><br /><p></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;">Altogether now:</span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;"><i>It’s always Christmas time for Visa!</i></span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;"><i>Mastercard gets presents every day!</i></span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;"><i>Our interest rate just went</i></span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;"><i>To 29 per cent</i></span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;"><i>Even though we’ve never failed to pay.</i></span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;"><i><br /></i></span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;">I'm always looking to expand my Christmas playlist, please share your favourites in the comments below or on Facebook.</span></p><p><br /></p><p><br /></p><p><br /></p><p><br /></p>Finnginnhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11408363976804920106noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-191345550099999047.post-83209712627292855702022-11-03T04:49:00.004-07:002022-11-03T04:53:05.917-07:00Of Time and CBeebies<span style="font-family: courier;"><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhr2lTM8FnALc0z77csLj3ZhOW8KyFaCQ6jMFAMI7c_mBb0MGs4CGrNdDTOu4Cfj7xeL_Gg2bEQQqXAxFvs50uXKknF1oqiZyDZ40s32MeCD03aC2ct6AFcTx-oFHZB3gjWC8rlOivmxMqq5a1CxPWez2dtfJJYJy4QjRyQj0d8X_UQaxiLzI74FjPK/s3992/lucian-alexe-f2xfTOv0p9Y-unsplash.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="2761" data-original-width="3992" height="276" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhr2lTM8FnALc0z77csLj3ZhOW8KyFaCQ6jMFAMI7c_mBb0MGs4CGrNdDTOu4Cfj7xeL_Gg2bEQQqXAxFvs50uXKknF1oqiZyDZ40s32MeCD03aC2ct6AFcTx-oFHZB3gjWC8rlOivmxMqq5a1CxPWez2dtfJJYJy4QjRyQj0d8X_UQaxiLzI74FjPK/w400-h276/lucian-alexe-f2xfTOv0p9Y-unsplash.jpg" width="400" /></a></div><br />Jean Paul Sartre opened <i>La Nausée</i> with the observation that 3 o'clock in the afternoon is too late or too early for anything that you want to do. I've not got a problem with 3pm. And I totally disagree that you can't do anything at 3pm. I can think of lots of things to do in Norwich at 3pm, and Norwich isn't exactly Paris.</span><div><span style="font-family: courier;"><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-family: courier;">Maybe Sartre's mates all had proper jobs and weren't available to head down to the Left Bank for a quick <i>café noir</i> and a natter about existentialism in the middle of the afternoon? But surely he could just pop to the library and find an autodidact to sneer at?</span></div><div><span style="font-family: courier;"><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-family: courier;">Now consider 4.30am, that is a time that is definitely either too late or too early for anything that you might want to do. Let me tell you. And I have become recently well-acquainted with that hour due to the clocks being regulated by some kind of governmental diktat and my younger son's body clock being regulated by his desire to spoon in a bowl of Weetabix drowned in blue top as soon as his tummy rumbles.</span></div><div><span style="font-family: courier;"><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-family: courier;">The collective insanity that causes us all to reverse the minute-hands of our clocks a full rotation at the end of October has always bothered me. I have an early memory of asking my Nana to explain how the Sun knew to rise at a different time.</span></div><div><span style="font-family: courier;"><br /></span></div><div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgFeaD2jbBXOUjcOqOXgOjBYvler6HXJazdCqM6RS_pscEdmtNVExZ_KRGHA7OA6-h8WwRap1WTylsB4shl62_zP0qtCz8tFtteIiYVdznb-jDKzyrlNWVTbHxKI1RK-0h87qscN_iT0Jnqs6yTdNuYB3gxoLGQ0gFmoubRpwEda8KUgH9RQYkGDp8B/s1302/FB_IMG_1667371118516.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1302" data-original-width="800" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgFeaD2jbBXOUjcOqOXgOjBYvler6HXJazdCqM6RS_pscEdmtNVExZ_KRGHA7OA6-h8WwRap1WTylsB4shl62_zP0qtCz8tFtteIiYVdznb-jDKzyrlNWVTbHxKI1RK-0h87qscN_iT0Jnqs6yTdNuYB3gxoLGQ0gFmoubRpwEda8KUgH9RQYkGDp8B/w246-h400/FB_IMG_1667371118516.jpg" width="246" /></a></div><br /></div><div><span style="font-family: courier;"><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-family: courier;">Baked a lovely Cornish pasty, my Nana, and was also ready to explain the basics of celestial mechanics when called upon. It's hard work being a Nana.</span></div><div><span style="font-family: courier;"><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-family: courier;">Carers of young children will already be aware that before CBeebies proper starts it's colourful assault on the senses, you get half an hour or so of Little Daydreams - lots of slow motion bubble blowing and jumping in puddles - all narrated by 2019 Best Actress Oscar winner Olivia Colman. But even the makers of Little Daydreams know that 4:30am is too early for a little auditory tactile synaesthesia - so they schedule that to start at 5:30am.</span></div><div><span style="font-family: courier;"><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-family: courier;">If he's allowed to choose what to watch while I aimlessly scroll through Twitter to see which government ministers are likely to resign in the coming parliamentary session, Ginger will inevitably opt for something from the 'blocks' Universe. These are 5 minute cartoons about personifications of abstract concepts that sing and dance. </span></div><div><span style="font-family: courier;"><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-family: courier;">So far the BBC has adapted the following philosophical concepts for the small screen:</span></div><div><span style="font-family: courier;"><br /></span></div><div><ul style="text-align: left;"><li><span style="font-family: courier;">phonemes ("alphablocks")</span></li><li><span style="font-family: courier;">integers ("numberblocks")</span></li><li><span style="font-family: courier;">qualia ("colourblocks")</span></li></ul><div><span style="font-family: courier;">I know what you're thinking - there's a clear gap in the market there for generative syntax ("grammarblocks"?)! But don't worry, I have written to the commissioning editor of CBeebies to suggest this for the next series. I've even written some suggested lyrics for the theme song:</span></div></div><div><span style="font-family: courier;"><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-family: courier;"><i>Grammarblocks! Grammarblocks!</i></span></div><div><span style="font-family: courier;"><i>Combine syntactically!</i></span></div><div><span style="font-family: courier;"><i>Grammarblocks! Grammarblocks!</i></span></div><div><span style="font-family: courier;"><i>They make syntactic trees!</i></span></div><div><span style="font-family: courier;"><i><br /></i></span></div><div><span style="font-family: courier;"><i>'S' is comprised (minimally)</i></span></div><div><span style="font-family: courier;"><i>Of one 'NP' and one 'VP'.</i></span></div><div><span style="font-family: courier;"><i>Modifiers, Adverbials</i></span></div><div><span style="font-family: courier;"><i>And don't forget Recursive Rules</i></span></div><div><span style="font-family: courier;"><i>For linguistic infinity!</i></span></div><div><span style="font-family: courier;"><i><br /></i></span></div><div><span style="font-family: courier;"><i>Grammarblocks! Grammarblocks! (et cetera)</i></span></div><div><span style="font-family: courier;"><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-family: courier;">I've yet to hear back. Anyhow it's time for a nap before the 3pm school run - Did I mention that I've been awake since 4:30?</span></div><div><span style="font-family: courier;"><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-family: courier;"><br /></span></div><div><span face="-apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "San Francisco", "Helvetica Neue", Helvetica, Ubuntu, Roboto, Noto, "Segoe UI", Arial, sans-serif" style="background-color: whitesmoke; color: #111111; font-size: 13px; white-space: nowrap;">Clocks Photo credit: </span><a href="https://unsplash.com/@lucian_alexe?utm_source=unsplash&utm_medium=referral&utm_content=creditCopyText" style="background-color: whitesmoke; box-sizing: border-box; color: #767676; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "San Francisco", "Helvetica Neue", Helvetica, Ubuntu, Roboto, Noto, "Segoe UI", Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; text-decoration-skip-ink: auto; transition: color 0.1s ease-in-out 0s, opacity 0.1s ease-in-out 0s; white-space: nowrap;">Lucian Alexe</a><span face="-apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "San Francisco", "Helvetica Neue", Helvetica, Ubuntu, Roboto, Noto, "Segoe UI", Arial, sans-serif" style="background-color: whitesmoke; color: #111111; font-size: 13px; white-space: nowrap;"> on </span><a href="https://unsplash.com/s/photos/clocks?utm_source=unsplash&utm_medium=referral&utm_content=creditCopyText" style="background-color: whitesmoke; box-sizing: border-box; color: #767676; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "San Francisco", "Helvetica Neue", Helvetica, Ubuntu, Roboto, Noto, "Segoe UI", Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; text-decoration-skip-ink: auto; transition: color 0.1s ease-in-out 0s, opacity 0.1s ease-in-out 0s; white-space: nowrap;">Unsplash</a></div><div>Young Finnginn with Nana photo credit: my mum?</div><div><span style="font-family: courier;"><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-family: courier;"><br /></span></div><div><br /></div><div><br /></div>Finnginnhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11408363976804920106noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-191345550099999047.post-15796340188038151062022-10-14T04:12:00.003-07:002022-10-14T04:16:00.279-07:00Bedtime Blues and Clerihews<p><span style="font-family: courier;">My younger son - to avoid confusion with the elder (Finn Jr), I'll call Ginn Jr (or maybe, Ginger?) -</span> <span style="font-family: courier;">is at an age where he is changing his preferred method of falling asleep.</span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;">Until recently, the best way of invoking a nap involved strapping him into either a pushchair or a car seat and expending either leg or diesel power to trundle him into the land of Nod.</span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;">However, I'd noticed that my evening walks pushing the buggy around the streets of Mile Cross were getting longer and longer and the end result less certain. Sometimes I would complete the whole extended podcast edition of <i>In Our Time</i> and, whilst my knowledge of the early modern Polish-Lithuanian Commonwealth would be satisfyingly increased, the little one would still be pushing the hood of the buggy back to get a better look at the people smoking outside Mecca Bingo.</span></p><p></p><table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody><tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiyoD3F6YyvWgj5_y9k6dMEVp3kvJP1aSE-xncCWSQbzC47we1S8X5onF9ZRUETDkUJjVMNSZyyp72yn2CNM9nfhTAqBKNl1nWkikgvS4Xx037RlRSEfW3eg7HYFJVc7LFIxjXddCSjZmX0TcNInQ8oAfaC4quLG_Qek4X-eIUhW15izgy0pXXTpE4h/s4080/PXL_20220812_182708194.jpg" style="clear: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img alt="baby in buggy" border="0" data-original-height="3072" data-original-width="4080" height="303" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiyoD3F6YyvWgj5_y9k6dMEVp3kvJP1aSE-xncCWSQbzC47we1S8X5onF9ZRUETDkUJjVMNSZyyp72yn2CNM9nfhTAqBKNl1nWkikgvS4Xx037RlRSEfW3eg7HYFJVc7LFIxjXddCSjZmX0TcNInQ8oAfaC4quLG_Qek4X-eIUhW15izgy0pXXTpE4h/w400-h303/PXL_20220812_182708194.jpg" width="400" /></a></td></tr><tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">I don't think we're in Mile Cross anymore...<br /></td></tr></tbody></table><br /><p><span style="font-family: courier;">I downloaded a step counting app to give myself an idea of how punishing these evening walks were becoming. The week when I twice recorded 19,000+ steps, I decided a new approach was needed.</span></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEglLaefqEWUvCfcgV-HZkvJPoY7ixBwPveAwT0My8kmIy3FgzKKbMfXFeSA55hWFreLzbzf0I5vVC5za3REu4FNcCpRhuWzt9UsqaCu7kHREYjmCA8bjF19CuEvxrS-_pS1j5biLsvO5DacbM_eFR5IMLz0xrrEsWGTcslOUqo8zL1VdtNTTSyZm7G7/s759/Screenshot_20221014-115459.png" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="759" data-original-width="655" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEglLaefqEWUvCfcgV-HZkvJPoY7ixBwPveAwT0My8kmIy3FgzKKbMfXFeSA55hWFreLzbzf0I5vVC5za3REu4FNcCpRhuWzt9UsqaCu7kHREYjmCA8bjF19CuEvxrS-_pS1j5biLsvO5DacbM_eFR5IMLz0xrrEsWGTcslOUqo8zL1VdtNTTSyZm7G7/s320/Screenshot_20221014-115459.png" width="276" /></a></div><br /><p><span style="font-family: courier;">I recalled a method of getting a child to sleep that had briefly worked with Finn Jr at a similar age. This is where I try waiting until he is really tired and lying down in the dark next to him and hoping like hell that he drops off before I do. 80% of the time, this works and I can transfer him to the cot and sneak downstairs for a rewarding glass of C</span><span id="docs-internal-guid-24353f1f-7fff-00e8-9549-23738fb845e0" style="font-family: courier;"><span style="font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">ô</span></span><i style="font-family: courier;">tes de Gascogne. </i><span style="font-family: courier;">The other 20%, my wife has to wake me up to tell me I've missed </span><i style="font-family: courier;">Only Connect</i><span style="font-family: courier;">.</span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;">In an attempt to stave off the inevitable wave of drowsiness that lying down in a darkened room brings on, I like to compose clerihews in my head. (I expect that you'll recall from <a href="https://www.finnginn.co.uk/2014/05/election-blues-and-clerihews.html" target="_blank">this 2014 Finnginn blog post</a> that clerihews are four line whimsical biographical poems that don't have to scan and follow an AABB rhyme scheme.)</span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;">A new crop of government ministers has revealed a rich harvest of names crying out to be Clerihewed (clerihewn?). Here are three that I have remembered long enough to write down:</span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;"><br /></span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;">Kwasi Kwarteng</span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;">Took up a pen</span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;">And wrote down a tax-and-spend policy</span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;">That wrote off the UK economy.</span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;"><br /></span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;">Suella Braverman</span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;">Do me a favour, man?!</span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;">What's sauce for the goose is sauce for the gander:</span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;">Stick yourself on the next flight to Rwanda.</span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;"><br /></span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;">Goodbye, Liz Truss -</span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;">Gone by Christmas.</span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;">When Liz Truss sees the Christmas trees</span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;">She'll celebrate with a plate of imported cheese.</span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;"><br /></span></p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><iframe allowfullscreen="" class="BLOG_video_class" height="266" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/aj49CogLemQ" width="320" youtube-src-id="aj49CogLemQ"></iframe></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><br /><span style="font-family: courier;">In the time I've taken to write and edit this, rumours have been circulating that Kwarteng has been sacked as Chancellor. You heard it here first!<br /></span><div><span style="font-family: courier;"><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-family: courier;"><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-family: courier;">In the interests of fairness, feel free to add your own clerihews about members of the shadow cabinet in the comments...</span><p></p><p><br /><span style="font-family: courier;"><br /></span></p></div>Finnginnhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11408363976804920106noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-191345550099999047.post-12742056769634944012022-10-07T08:11:00.003-07:002022-10-07T08:11:44.082-07:00Notes on quitting smoking<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg8O8C6g6pYWS4_3P3d9vllBunct__2cgEtHW3RfSUU6bk_EXEsVyyIid14kykC6q6FzoQQa6a1T4qkXj7Xi_2-6r72Py0hleHrgysES1c8tLcBE4WJjsKGDMjSkIfE69N4O4RKxxl4YrP1PDhYlR-BL6M-BWCw6DPlSozL_zrIajphVDyrDTGv846N/s538/smoking_like_a_boss.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="359" data-original-width="538" height="268" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg8O8C6g6pYWS4_3P3d9vllBunct__2cgEtHW3RfSUU6bk_EXEsVyyIid14kykC6q6FzoQQa6a1T4qkXj7Xi_2-6r72Py0hleHrgysES1c8tLcBE4WJjsKGDMjSkIfE69N4O4RKxxl4YrP1PDhYlR-BL6M-BWCw6DPlSozL_zrIajphVDyrDTGv846N/w400-h268/smoking_like_a_boss.jpg" width="400" /></a></div><br /><p><span style="font-family: courier;">Two years ago, perhaps a decade after the above photo was taken by my stepsister, I was convinced to give quitting tobacco a go - and I'm finally ready to talk about the experience.</span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;">There are two chief categories of ex-smoker that I encountered while bartending:</span></p><p></p><ol style="text-align: left;"><li><span style="font-family: courier;">Those who secretly still love smoking - who will blag rollies off you when they are drunk and without their partner.</span></li><li><span style="font-family: courier;">Those who apparently never really liked smoking in the first place and become vehement campaigners in the anti-tobacco lobby.</span></li></ol><p></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;">I think I am destined to be a category one ex-smoker. But here are my notes on quitting in case they are useful to anyone else thinking of sucking their final menthol tip.</span></p><p><b><span style="font-family: courier;">The physical experience of quitting</span></b></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;">Overcoming the physical addiction to nicotine has been made much easier by the invention of vaping. In the early days of quitting smoking, I was able to ease my cravings by vaping. Luckily, vaping is a thoroughly unpleasant experience and therefore much easier to stop.</span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;">When the battery was fully charged, the experience of vaping was like being at an amateur dramatics production of Macbeth when an over-eager stagehand gives the dry-ice machine full throttle. When the battery was low, the model I adopted was liable to malfunction and deposit a thin dribble of acidic vaping liquid into the mouth. </span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;">I was able to give up vaping within a week (compare that to the smooth taste of delicious Golden Virginia, that had me hooked for a quarter century).</span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;">Some people seem to love vaping, so maybe I wasn't doing it right? Perhaps I lack the willpower to experiment with flavours and equipment to make it a proper habit. If so I might be the first person to give up nicotine through a lack of willpower?</span></p><p><b><span style="font-family: courier;">The mental experience of quitting</span></b></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;">I found it helpful to imagine there is a little compartment somewhere in the mind where you can put thoughts to ignore them. By definition, minds are mental phenomena, where the imaginary is real - so imagining like this is a feature that your mind possesses is sufficient to make it a feature that your mind possesses. Believing in your imaginary ignored memory compartment makes it real enough for our purposes.</span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;">Thus equipped, when your mind occasionally nudges: “Time for a lovely cigarette!”, you have a compartment ready to file away the thought. And you don't just have to use it for cigarette cravings - why not store your nagging regrets, resentments and anxieties in it too? Just make sure you seal it up really tight - don't want that lot leaking out on a random rainy Thursday hangover.</span></p><table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><tbody><tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgwo7r8xXpTxANU3FHj2GWnXl8QkK4d9SRTLTuUYW7dDtqRRlSUlq8Z9wNEYTy-qHEsdwJLDUOi7LfelA2klV6RTIAACzKj_6FPgsr1ZM8Op0lbdyoVY77NcWKbKt0A_bEX0RJC3AZ6a8lK-wCIwXZsvxqRwFxiW1K3REkoKNrb3jDqqHcPC_u8HlHg/s400/smoking%20before-after.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" data-original-height="200" data-original-width="400" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgwo7r8xXpTxANU3FHj2GWnXl8QkK4d9SRTLTuUYW7dDtqRRlSUlq8Z9wNEYTy-qHEsdwJLDUOi7LfelA2klV6RTIAACzKj_6FPgsr1ZM8Op0lbdyoVY77NcWKbKt0A_bEX0RJC3AZ6a8lK-wCIwXZsvxqRwFxiW1K3REkoKNrb3jDqqHcPC_u8HlHg/w400-h200/smoking%20before-after.jpg" width="400" /></a></td></tr><tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">As you can see from this before and after, quitting smoking enables you to grow a fulsome moustache as you won't be setting fire to it trying to relight half-inch long rollies that have gone out. </td></tr></tbody></table><br /><p><br /></p><p><br /></p><p><br /></p><div><br /></div><div><br /></div><div><br /></div><div><b><br /></b></div><div><br /></div>Finnginnhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11408363976804920106noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-191345550099999047.post-36387512234331426902022-09-30T06:44:00.001-07:002022-10-01T01:08:12.934-07:0020/20 Hindsight, 10/20 Vision<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgaTjB8lHiy774lTU2ccUpjJcxBxiL-4JLGeJf_-IGyXB576Gpu6PTQ37obNh5d_92rbz4W47CmlswTV_50Ni596bKzUgBmiIwVZFDZbJiD0lzOG80niYu9hT97LyOXH_VCJKVYqgV29Q7pY7HUGmy7yVEWlCn0CjZOAbiix-Z470jk-vh-kmMF63T7/s2336/david-travis-aVvZJC0ynBQ-unsplash.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1558" data-original-width="2336" height="266" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgaTjB8lHiy774lTU2ccUpjJcxBxiL-4JLGeJf_-IGyXB576Gpu6PTQ37obNh5d_92rbz4W47CmlswTV_50Ni596bKzUgBmiIwVZFDZbJiD0lzOG80niYu9hT97LyOXH_VCJKVYqgV29Q7pY7HUGmy7yVEWlCn0CjZOAbiix-Z470jk-vh-kmMF63T7/w400-h266/david-travis-aVvZJC0ynBQ-unsplash.jpg" width="400"></a></div><br><p>I'm frequently distracted by the live feeds of unending crises. Since my last post here, we've had a Conservative election landslide, Brexit, global pandemic, war in Europe... and Liz Truss voted Prime Minister by a proportion of the electorate so small that I booked an appointment to get my eyesight checked at a local opticians' clinic just so I could see it. Turns out three years sat in a darkened room doomscrolling has left me a little myopic. </p><p>An in-built desire to please/win makes me a terrible subject for eyetests. Five years ago, I went to a popular highstreet chain (that I'll just call GoggleGrafters). The optician conducting the tests did my good eye first. When he came to measure the problem eye, I remembered the sequence of letters and reeled them off perfectly.</p><p>This time I went to a friendly local independent clinic, the kind of place where they still make you a cup of tea while you're waiting to see the specialist, but also insist on you wearing a face mask so you're sort of left carrying a cup of tea around as the entropy in the room slowly increases. This optician had clearly met my type before - she did my bad eye first so I couldn't cheat.</p><p>One aspect of the examination not offered at GoggleGrafters (but thoughtfully included at my more recent test) was an explanation of my macular degeneration.</p><p>"Those bumps you can see on the right eye display are sun damage."</p><p>At some point in my childhood, I'd chosen to look at the sun and permanently damaged one of my eyes. I have no memory of this, but staring at the sun sounds like the sort of thing childhood me would have been sufficiently sensible and risk averse to attempt with just the one eye.</p><p>Once the lens strength appropriate for a solar-induced maculo-retinal deterioration had been determined, I was invited to inspect a selection of frames. </p><p>"What did you have in mind?" </p><p>I asked if they had something like the pair that Noam Chomsky wore for his <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3wfNl2L0Gf8" target="_blank">1971 debate on human nature</a> with Michel Foucault. </p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><iframe allowfullscreen="" class="BLOG_video_class" height="266" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/3wfNl2L0Gf8" width="320" youtube-src-id="3wfNl2L0Gf8"></iframe></div><p>"What were you looking to spend?"</p><p>All that doomscrolling has left me with the distinct impression that there's a cost of living crisis on, so I hesitantly scribbled a suitably conservative (small-c) figure on a piece of paper.</p><p>"Ah... Perhaps you should have gone to GoggleGrafters?"</p><p><br></p><p><br></p><p><br></p><p>Header Photo by <a href="https://unsplash.com/@dtravisphd?utm_source=unsplash&utm_medium=referral&utm_content=creditCopyText">David Travis</a> on <a href="https://unsplash.com/s/photos/opticians?utm_source=unsplash&utm_medium=referral&utm_content=creditCopyText">Unsplash</a></p><p><br></p>Finnginnhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11408363976804920106noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-191345550099999047.post-70537334384941739202019-11-19T07:29:00.003-08:002019-11-19T07:44:59.885-08:00Leaders Leaders Leaders Debate Debate Debate*<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<span style="font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace;">You're probably all familiar with the six demands made by the 19th Century parliamentary reform movement known as <a href="https://www.parliament.uk/about/living-heritage/transformingsociety/electionsvoting/chartists/overview/chartistmovement/" target="_blank">the Chartists</a>. Four of them have more or less come to pass:</span><br />
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<li><span style="font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace;">Paid MPs</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace;">Equal sized constituencies</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace;">Abolition of the property qualification for becoming an MP</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace;">Secret ballots</span></li>
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<span style="font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace;">A fifth (universal male suffrage) has even been been surpassed, thanks to the direct action taken by <a href="https://www.parliament.uk/about/living-heritage/transformingsociety/electionsvoting/womenvote/">the Suffragettes</a> a century ago.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace;">The final Chartist demand was for annual parliamentary elections. Be careful what you wish for...</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace;">Yes. It's election time again! As usual, the national discussion is starting with the big debate about which leaders should be allowed to take part in the big debates. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace;">Like the Xmas jumper (see <a href="https://www.finnginn.co.uk/2015/12/plato-deindividuation-and-christmas.html">Finnginn </a><i><a href="https://www.finnginn.co.uk/2015/12/plato-deindividuation-and-christmas.html">passim</a>)</i> the debates have an illusion of tradition but, in fact, they only <a href="https://www.theguardian.com/commentisfree/2010/apr/16/leaders-tv-debates-jonathan-freedland">started in 2010</a>: when the incumbent Gordon Brown and challenger David Cameron spent the whole evening saying how much they agreed with Nick Clegg. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace;">In 2015, the Labour and Conservative leaders were in the same building but didn't debate each other, they each separately faced a grilling from the audience and Jeremy Paxman. The most memorable thing that happened was Ed Miliband managed to trip over stepping off the weird Q-shaped stage.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace;">In 2017, the incumbent Conservative Prime Minister, <a href="https://www.theyworkforyou.com/mp/10426/theresa_may/maidenhead">Theresa May</a> - who had been watching her poll ratings tumble each time she appeared on TV - bottled it completely and sent <a href="https://www.theyworkforyou.com/mp/24829/andrea_leadsom/south_northamptonshire">Andrea Leadsom</a> in her place. This was the year when there were 9 party representatives on the stage. So each only got about 45 seconds of airtime that was mostly spent being interrupted by <a href="https://www.wlrn.org/post/what-do-if-you-see-poisonous-bufo-toad-near-your-property">Nigel Farage</a>.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace;">So, tonight, as is traditional (but actually for the first ever time) the leaders of the two main parties in the United Kingdom will present their policies and their rebuttals of their opponents' policies to the nation. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace;">The reason that Chartists wanted annual elections was so that if politicians failed to deliver on their promises, the people could quickly replace them. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace;">If you are depressed about the state of politics today, and feeling low about the struggles ahead, have a listen to the Chartists' Anthem (as rendered here by Chumbawamba) and remember how far we have come:</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace;">*For an explanation of why linguists think the title of today's post (Leaders leaders leaders debate debate debate) works as a theoretically parsable sentence in English, see my blog post from five years ago: <a href="https://www.finnginn.co.uk/2014/12/ask-finnginn-ii-recursion-excusion.html">Ask Finnginn II: The Recursion Excursion</a>. </span><br />
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Finnginnhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11408363976804920106noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-191345550099999047.post-38648808309291842902019-09-26T14:56:00.002-07:002019-09-26T14:57:44.332-07:00The Coming Week in Politics<div dir="ltr">
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<span style="font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace;">It was a cheap and obvious political gambit for the opposition parties to deny the Conservatives their desired three day recess for conference.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace;">Naturally, the conference will go ahead anyway. </span><span style="font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace;">I wonder what have they <a href="https://calendar.parliament.uk/calendar/Commons/All/2019/10/2/Daily" target="_blank">tabled for discussion</a> in their absence? Here's what the Leader of the House (the oft-recumbent Jacob Rees-Mogg) has put forward: </span><br />
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<li><span style="font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace;">Monday: Northern Ireland Executive Formation</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace;">Wednesday: Domestic Abuse Bill</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace;">Thursday: Women's Mental Health</span></li>
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<span style="font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace;">I've been following the progress of the Domestic Abuse Bill in particular (one of the organisations I write for in my day job runs refuges for people who have experienced domestic abuse). An early iteration of this Bill failed for political reasons when Theresa May called an election in 2017.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace;">A second reading of the Bill has been scheduled by the Leader of the House for Wednesday 2nd October. And a good thing, too. But I want to question the motives of this .</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace;">Seems likely that, with many Conservative MPs away at their conference, the Executive don’t want MPs taking advantage of the government’s lack of a majority to take control of parliamentary proceedings. </span><span style="font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace;">By scheduling debates on Domestic Abuse and women’s mental health while they are away schmoozing with their corporate paymasters, the Conservative government are betting that the opposition parties won’t change the agenda back to Brexit for fear of looking like they lack compassion for these issues. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace;">Clever politics perhaps. But also revealing about where their neoliberal priorities lie.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace;">Imagine a House of Commons where these subjects are given the prominence they deserve by people who care about the issues. That's the Commons we could have if the people choosing to attend conference (rather than debate the topics that they themselves have tabled for their absence) were removed.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace;">Elections are coming. Question the motives and priorities of your representatives.</span></div>
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Finnginnhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11408363976804920106noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-191345550099999047.post-40240722019356182912019-03-15T16:59:00.000-07:002019-03-15T16:59:16.955-07:00Nine New Brexit Metaphors<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">One small pleasure to come out of watching all the recent UK political conversations has been the proliferation of Brexit metaphors. You're probably familiar with the <a href="https://www.theguardian.com/politics/video/2016/dec/06/theresa-may-i-want-a-red-white-and-blue-brexit-video">Red, White and Blue Brexit</a>, the <a href="https://inews.co.uk/news/politics/tory-erg-divisions-laid-bare-ahead-of-brexit-vote/">Hotel California Brexit</a> and the <a href="https://www.theguardian.com/politics/2019/mar/13/eu-extend-brexit-talks-complete-barnier-brussels-assurance">Titanic Brexit</a>. Keen observers can probably add the <a href="https://www.nytimes.com/2019/02/14/world/europe/dutch-brexit-blue-monster.html">Blue Fluffy Monster Brexit</a> and the <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Xm6Id3Qt8Wk">Peppermint Tea Brexit</a>.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">As a gift to hardworking pundits as Brexit looks set to extend beyond the promised 29th March deadline, here's a few more to bear in mind...</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;"><b>Cathedral City Brexit</b></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">A Brexit aimed at pleasing the residents of parochial cities such as Norwich, York and Salisbury, this Brexit has the whiff of costly imported cheddar.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;"><b>School Disco Brexit</b></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;">A Brexit where all the Leavers are dancing away provocatively, whilst all the Remainers are sulking by the wall and wishing they were popular enough to join in.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;"><b>Corned Beef Hash Brexit</b></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">I've been accidentally stockpiling corned beef for years before the threat of no deal Brexit made stockpiling fashionable. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">For reasons beyond my understanding, m</span><span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;">y wife doesn't like me to eat meals comprised chiefly of fatty processed meat</span><span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;">. So, naturally, when s</span><span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;">he took Finn Jr down to visit the in-laws recently, I retrieved from the back of the cupboard the can of corned beef that was least past its sell-by-date to make a delicious corned beef hash. I even, as comedy tradition demands, managed to cut my hand opening the can. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;">When I sat down to eat the meal of canned meat fried in butter with potato and onion, disaster struck! No HP sauce! </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;">The Corned Beef Hash Brexit is a Brexit defined by illicit enjoyment of a forbidden meal ruined by the fact that its <a href="https://www.theguardian.com/artanddesign/jonathanjonesblog/2014/jun/13/hp-sauce-britishness-art-david-mach-scottish-independence">ideal accompaniment</a> is manufactured in the EU.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;"><b>Drill and Fill Brexit</b></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;">A Brexit that you keep putting off because you are convinced that you have advanced periodontitis, but it turns out you have just been over-indulging from the office biscuit tin and need a filling. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;"><b>George Orwell Brexit</b></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;">"If you want a picture of the future, imagine a boot stamping on a human face - forever."</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;"><b>Mad Cow Disease Brexit</b></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">[Insert <strike>Theresa May</strike> (DEFRA more politically correct?) joke here]</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;"><b>Black Spot Brexit</b></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;">A Brexit handed to you by a blind pirate that makes you want to throttle yourself.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;"><b>Full English Brexit</b></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;">Bacon, mushrooms, fried egg, sausage, black pudding, toast, beans, Scottish independence, Welsh indifference and a hard customs border in the Irish Sea.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;"><b>Full Irish Brexit</b></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;">The same as above but with additional white pudding and a soft border between the Republic and the North.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;"><b>Meanwhile...</b></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;">The striking kids have got it right. Our actions are changing the habitability of the only planet we can live on. Perhaps we should be focusing on that?</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;"><br /></span>Finnginnhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11408363976804920106noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-191345550099999047.post-65922431543385475102019-02-05T08:18:00.002-08:002019-02-05T08:20:09.667-08:00Venturing into the Shed<span style="font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace;">It started, as so many things do, with the purchase of what I hope one day to be a flourishing <i>Sorbus Aucuparia. </i>Currently, it is just an 8 foot twig in a pot. As soon as the ground has thawed sufficiently for me to dig a hole, I plan to plant the tree in a space I have been saving in the corner of my traditional mixed hedgerow. I am going to need a spade and some compost. Unfortunately... that means venturing into the shed.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace;">The shed was erected by the previous occupants of our house about a week before they decided to sell it to us. Quite why they decided to erect a shed on a property they intended to sell is a mystery. But our house came with an uninsulated, but relatively spacious, brand new shed.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace;">Lots of famous writers have worked in sheds. Roald Dahl, Dylan Thomas, Virginia Woolf and Philip Pullman spring immediately to mind, and I'll bet that you have your own favourites. I could imagine myself writing in my shed: blanket over the knees in winter, door open in the summer, staring out the window to see songbirds peck the berries of a flourishing <i>Sorbus Aucuparia </i>in the autumn - you get the picture.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace;">The first hindrance was the lawn mower. I knew, I suppose, on some level, that lawns need mowing and that mowers need to be stored somewhere, and the shed is the logical place for the mower to be stored etc. But I can't imagine Virginia Woolf staring at a greasy lawn mower when she was bashing out <i>To The Lighthouse </i>on her <a href="https://www.nypl.org/blog/2012/02/17/virginia-woolfs-typewriter" target="_blank">portable Underwood</a> (<i>a</i>lthough perhaps that was her inspiration for <i>Kew Gardens</i>!).</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace;">Then came the barbecue. It was one of those kettle barbecues on a tripod of wheels that never feels well-balanced. I assembled it on the morning of Finn Jr's 1st birthday party, cooked on it in the afternoon of Finn Jr's 1st birthday party, and then put it and the accompanying bags of charcoal in the shed - where it has sat ever since, except when I have to move it so I can get the lawn mower out.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace;">This winter, the lawn mower and the barbecue have been joined by two broken sofas, a bicycle, two bags of peat-free compost, various digging implements and all the recycling from when we missed a collection over Christmas. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace;">Today, I thought I would make a start on sorting it all out. Not least so that I could get to the spade and compost and plant my <i>Sorbus Aucuparia.</i> Have you ever tried to saw a broken sofa in half with a handsaw so that you can get it in the back of a Fiesta? I bet Dylan Thomas never had to do this. Do not go gently into that full shed!</span><br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj26GLWPbScpj1xD8LzJewn0gqo5L1oGSH2QH7Ky1idM5SIDaBmIE5MR15y5-ax2i8n7hUTTiQ7FCbeMAIWIU8AyuWCP4IyQgHGEwveK4xzhz1LeNNWIbk45ODXSCgsJ6oW97InSA39cTg/s1600/IMG_20190205_130403413_HDR.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1600" data-original-width="1200" height="640" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj26GLWPbScpj1xD8LzJewn0gqo5L1oGSH2QH7Ky1idM5SIDaBmIE5MR15y5-ax2i8n7hUTTiQ7FCbeMAIWIU8AyuWCP4IyQgHGEwveK4xzhz1LeNNWIbk45ODXSCgsJ6oW97InSA39cTg/s640/IMG_20190205_130403413_HDR.jpg" width="480" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">The large twig to the right of the shed is my new Sorbus Aucuparia.</td></tr>
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<span style="font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace;"><br /></span>Finnginnhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11408363976804920106noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-191345550099999047.post-89131087425476236232018-09-24T14:35:00.003-07:002018-09-25T03:11:00.882-07:00Summer Reading Round-Up<span style="font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace;"><br /></span>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjYUtZXPQJOTFa2XGnfq_DzqLnxomom-PscoooXht17DCePvo5B3x8uxmxDeTlp6g8FYsUofRAkeNLVa6ij9zxxGEQ8aBpV0yxNKTXJFNxL_VJHhxYwbj3fNTzaYWlCXysANrTbkBCz544/s1600/IMG_20180924_224543767.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1200" data-original-width="1600" height="300" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjYUtZXPQJOTFa2XGnfq_DzqLnxomom-PscoooXht17DCePvo5B3x8uxmxDeTlp6g8FYsUofRAkeNLVa6ij9zxxGEQ8aBpV0yxNKTXJFNxL_VJHhxYwbj3fNTzaYWlCXysANrTbkBCz544/s400/IMG_20180924_224543767.jpg" width="400" /></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace;">When I was a bartender I used to read, on average, a book a week. Now I consider myself lucky if I get through a book in a month. Here's my summer reading round-up:</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace;"><a href="https://www.lrb.co.uk/v40/n03/nick-richardson/even-what-doesnt-happen-is-epic">The Dark Forest by Cixin Liu</a></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace;"><br /></span><span style="font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace;">As you folks probably know better than I do, a 9-5 job and the demands of a small child are not conducive to keeping up with the latest developments in Chinese Science Fiction. Thus, I am only on the second volume of Cixin Liu's Three Body Problem sequence. The titular forest is a fabulous metaphor for a particularly depressing answer to what is sometimes called <a href="https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fermi_paradox">the Fermi Paradox</a>. (Paradoxically, the Fermi Paradox isn't actually a paradox). </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace;">Where's Spot? by <a href="https://www.theguardian.com/books/2014/jun/10/eric-hill">Eric Hill</a></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace;">Spot isn't the star of 'Where's Spot?' On first reading, you wonder whether the author is going to pull a Beckettian swerve and have the eponymous hero absent: a Godot-like anti-presence. On the 199th reading, even the planned surprises in 'Where's Spot?' cease to be surprising (especially now that Finn Jr has ripped off two thirds of the flaps). However, a quest narrative with a strong female lead and a false ending/twist (no spoilers) is a Gold Standard that fiction writers consistently fail to meet. And Eric Hill did it in fewer than fifty words! </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace;"><a href="https://www.mhpbooks.com/books/whos-who-when-everyone-is-someone-else/">Who's Who When Everyone Is Someone Else</a> by CD Rose</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace;">When my aunt asked me for recommendations for her book club, this was my immediate suggestion. The tale of a minor academic visiting a street-shifting unnamed European city to deliver lectures on unread books to dwindling numbers of attendees. The reader gets to sit in on each of these lectures and explore the city and meet a number of its quirky inhabitants. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace;">With my currently limited schedule for reading books aimed at adults, I am looking forward to revisiting WWWEISE and, if you already know how Where's Spot? ends and your book group is divided on the merits of Chinese science fiction, I recommend you check out the latest from CD Rose.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace;"><br /></span>Finnginnhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11408363976804920106noreply@blogger.com0